Overcoming Schizophrenia

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

2012-01-27T08:39:00.002-05:00

The following blog entry was written by a guest blogger:

My name is Christina Bruni and I want to thank Ashley for allowing me to be a guest blogger at Overcoming Schizophrenia. I'm the Living Life columnist for SZ magazine and the community leader and expert blogger at HealthCentral's schizophrenia community Web site.

Life is not easy-it is not always, and sometimes it is not often-golden for those of us with SZ or another MI. The respect and compassion seemingly so freely given from one so-called normal to another is not routinely given to the neediest of us in society, who do our bravest and our best to manage our schizophrenia, to manage whatever life chose to give us.

I propose-as I have in my own blog, Left of the Dial-that we fight hate with love, we send those ignorant and fearful people a healing vibe, and wish them well. More than this, I submit we cannot afford to treat each other, as peers, with less than respect, dignity, compassion and AWE. Awe for what a great job each of us does to soldier on every day with varying levels of symptoms.

We each of us will have good days and not-so-good days, and this is how it goes for all of us, so-called normal or not. I choose optimism as a response; I want to keep up a positive spirit in the face of so much resistance, because certainly hope heals.

We can choose how we respond to stigma. It carries no weight with me. Every day I come in contact with so-called normal people who, without any known or verifiable diagnnosis, act like the worst stereotype of those of us who were locked up. While they do their thing, I tell no one I was once branded as having schizophrenia because I have been in the real back wards.

I admire how quickly Ashley committed to a life of advocacy so soon after her diagnosis. My own rocky road in recovery was long and winding, yet in 2002 I decided to become a mental health activist too. We can no longer afford to feel guilty and ashamed for having SZ when we have the best role models to inspire us in the recovery movement.

My buried secret-no longer a shame-will be revealed when my memoir, Left of the Dial, is published in the fall of this year by Vantage Point Books. I wrote the book-which focuses on recovery, not illness, to uplift and inspire all of you walking this road of recovery.

There is hope and there can be happiness and there can be harmony in your head-living with schizophrenia. I take my medication every day as prescribed and I credit this as the key to unlocking the door to my success. I share my story to encourage you to look on the bright side, to always be hopeful, to not be sad or upset when others in the world are not kind to you.

I understand how hard it is living with this diagnosis; it isn't easy.

We're all in this together-let's extend a hand to each other. Together we can win.

To go to Christina's blog click here.

Blind to the Person with the Illness

2012-01-06T20:41:00.000-05:00

Recovering from schizophrenia is an ongoing learning experience- what I learn about myself, peers, and research. Whenever I share my personal experience I try to use appropriate terminology to not offend, misrepresent, or make it sound too traumatic and without hope- Yes, schizophrenia can be a debilitating illness, however, it can also be very manageable, which I focus on the latter outcome to provide hope to my peers and families effected by mental health.

When I share my story I frequently use the phrase 'living with schizophrenia' opposed to 'suffering from schizophrenia,' because I have overcome the hardest part of the illness, to me- that being psychosis and the criticizing voices that nobody else heard. It does not bother me when someone uses either of the phrases, because everyone's experience is different.

There is no right or wrong way to describe one's experience with a mental health concern, in my opinion. Like so many perspectives on life, there is no specific style to depict one's feelings and emotions, or response to a mental health diagnosis... So why do some of us still compare and judge a person's recovery???- There is no standard like there is no normal person or perfect person, so why do some people still make comparisons?

I can go on and on about why we should not compare, but that is too easy to discuss, so why don't we take a look at ourselves and be truthful about whether we are judgmental or not and why. I used to be very judgmental before I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, not because I was mean-spirited, but rather because of my lack of life's challenges and ignorance.

I remember nurses trying to persuade me to take medication in jail, but I refused because I did not know I was battling with a severe illness like schizophrenia. In fact, I remember seeing several jail mates take their medication like candy, to me, and thinking I was better because I did not need medication. However, the truth be told I was probably one of the sickest inmates in that unit... I eventually stopped speaking, showering, moving and functioning.

Being diagnosed, in jail, has chipped off a lot of judgmental attitudes I had previously. Now, I feel like I can relate to more people of diverse lifestyles, not because we may have had similar upbringings, but rather because we have experienced something traumatic, life-changing, and stigmatizing; and more bluntly put- taboo.

Now, it concerns me when some individuals want their loved one to recover like me, because I see someone making unfair comparisons on two individuals in recovery without all the pieces to the puzzle to make a far-fetched criteria for wellness. A common question I get from some is: 'how long did take you to get to where you are now in your recovery?' Even though this concerns me, I understand this individual's intent is not to be judgmental or to harm anyone, however, it seems to naturally hinder their loved one's growth in recovery, to me, with the expectations to see results.

Like many families affected by mental health and its ups and downs, my family struggled too. More specifically, my mother and me. Several members of our family gossiped and blamed my mother for my psychic break. It did not help that my illness impacted my feelings, thoughts, and mood around my mother to make me angry, distant, and unwilling to cooperate when she tried to help. I consider my mother a survivor of the remnants of my mental health because she endured a lot to hold my hand through this entire experience; before, during, and after my diagnosis, which I am grateful for because I believe her support plays an intricate role in my recovery.

Finally, it is upsetting when individuals hold a strong opinion about mental health-related concerns when (1) they have never experienced it, (2) or never encountered it through a loved one, or (3) even researched it to know what exactly they are talking about.

Therefore, I challenge you as a peer, family member, and health care professional, and citizen, to not correct and judge an individual's experience with mental illness, and to be more open-minded, and to not place expectations on other people's lives when you do not know their personal history.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit: Embracing My Mind, Inc., Choices in Recovery, NAMI, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

From the Terrors of Psychosis to Hope and a Better Life

2011-12-05T10:08:00.000-05:00

For me, experiencing psychosis is an experience I will never forget. In short, psychosis is when an individual cannot distinguish reality. I endured a psychotic experience at the age of 20, almost five years ago, and still remember the terrors of the illness- officially diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenia in 2007.

The manifestation of the illness dominated my livelihood whenever I was extremely suspicious, confused, forgetful, irritable, distant, irrational, and hearing criticizing voices when nobody was around. In my mind, everyone was envious of me because I had godly talents. I thought I could read people's minds and understand them, and sometimes they could read my mind as well. I rationalized these strange beliefs by my faith in God and the miracles of the Bible. I believed I was on a mission for God and eventually thought I was Jesus Christ being persecuted again when I was arrested for a crime I committed while not in the right state of mind. The bizarre thoughts increased.

While in jail I thought a family member was playing a prank on me and I did not recognize I was incarcerated for a long time. Still institutionalized I began to believe authorities experimented on me and impregnated me with a shot while I was asleep. Then I went on a prayer fast. I remember reading a scripture in the Bible that said to remain still and to pray, and that's what I did for hours throughout the day. Eventually, jail medical staff admitted me into the psychiatric ward and labelled me catatonic, not moving my body limbs for extended periods of time. These are just a glimpse of some of the bizarre beliefs I had, I could share a multitude of other thoughts, feelings, and emotions I recall from my experience with the illness at its worse, but I'll share more with you another time.

The most frightening realization after the encounter was discovering that these emotions and feelings were fabricated in my mind, and mine only- the people I thought were against me were not obsessed with me and did not want any harm to come to me, like I thought. I remember slowly putting the truth together while writing in my diary and second-guessing myself after discussing symptoms with my doctor, and learning more about the illness in a state hospital. In fact, I think I cried after piecing together some of my encounters which were real to me, but not a reality for others. Schizophrenia can be devastating if an individual does not cling to faith and hope.

My doctor at the state hospital gave me a lot of hope. He said I could go back to college and live a normal life as long as I did two things: 1) take my medication regularly, and 2) manage my stress... I have not gone off my medication, I continue to find ways to cope with stress such as writing and communicating concerns with others, and I have not experienced psychosis in over four years since my diagnosis in 2007.

I reminiscence on this blog about the times I was not well in order to spread awareness and hope, because I made it and I believe many others can too with proper treatment, support, and diligence; and faith. If you or someone you know is struggling with a mental health concern seek professional guidance and continue to support them as you would with any other medical condition.

My hope is that people will view schizophrenia as a medical condition that can improve with treatment, support, and the right attitude... My objective is to reduce stigma, change perceptions, and to open dialogue around mental health concerns. I hope that my story encourages a change in the way people view individuals with mental health conditions and know that the illness can be managed.

I appreciate my readers and look forward to reading your feedback, thank you for making time to read my story.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., Choices in Recovery, National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

CNN- "Human Factor" Note

2011-11-08T03:03:00.002-05:00

Recently my story was featured on CNN's Dr. Sanjay Gupta's Human Factor. I feel blessed to have an opportunity to share my experience with diverse communities around the world. I believe it is important to share my mental health condition with the public in order to help reduce stigma. Yes, sharing my mental illness has been a process.

I remember when I started this blog in September 2008 I was unsure about its theme and how much I would disclose. Initially, I did not share my true identity, and now I am very comfortable disclosing to the public about my health condition, because I have overcome many medical and social setbacks. I believe this illness can be defeated through treatment, support, faith and hard work.

For individuals and families still struggling with a mental health concern: as you know there will be many obstacles to reach peace with mental health and to live in recovery, however, there is hope. I remember the stories my mother and family shared with me about their worries and concerns for my well-being during my own battle with schizophrenia. In the beginning we did not know I was battling mental health. In fact, I thought it was stress and emotional and spiritual battles. However, my condition worsened over time. Therefore, I encourage families to seek professional guidance when debating whether mental health is a factor.

I am so fortunate to have a family of warriors. My mother and relatives stuck by me during my most vulnerable moments. My mother got involved with the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and gained a better understanding of my condition by meeting with my treatment team at the state hospital (after I gave consent).

In short, I encourage families to learn as much as they can about mental health challenges and to get involved in a support group to get more resources and support.

Lastly, I had a great experience during the process of producing the CNN Human Factor story. I am so thankful to the CNN team and my communications staff for working so diligently on my story. My experience is one of millions in America, and I am hopeful that we can "overcome mental illness together!"

Please review the Human Factor segment on CNN and blog entry, and let me know how the story has impacted you and your family.

For more info about schizophrenia visit Choices in Recovery, Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Changing with my Recovery

2011-08-29T23:31:00.004-04:00

It is amazing how much my recovery has changed. I can remember a time in my recovery where my goal was to socialize with someone because I felt distant from peers and my community. Now, I talk to a lot of peers and other members of the community. Its great to see how my recovery matures and my goals continue to change.

I have many goals, short-term and long-term that I occasionally update and revise. One of my short term goals was to complete the Certified Peer Specialist training program, and after three years I can finally check off that goal on my list, thank you!

Another one of my goals was to live independently. As I mentioned in another blog entry recently, I entered into a housing program with the county and moved into a group home to feel in control of my housing and life. This decision alone empowered me. And now, I live on my own. I live alone in the community of my choice and I love having this opportunity. In fact, I hope peers will have similar experiences of self-empowerment and goal-fulfillment.

I believe it is important to lead one's own recovery. Self-direction is critical to my recovery and I can imagine it being important in a peer's life as well. Recovery has various meanings to different individuals. To me recovery is being able to do what I want and need to do to add fulfillment to my well-being.

Despite the diagnosis I believe we should all have the opportunity and privilege to make decisions on our behalf, to advocate for ourselves. Schizophrenia can seem like a scary illness to manage but it is doable, I am proof!

I am interested to learn what recovery means to you? For the individual living with a mental health diagnosis: Are you willing to change along with your recovery? For family members and caregivers: are you willing to allow your loved one to make their own decisions in recovery? Why or why not.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Choices in Recovery, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Who Is In Control of My Recovery?

2011-08-19T10:59:00.001-04:00

Are we listening? Are we listening to the one in control of recovery? Who is in control of recovery? Is it our doctors? Our family members and friends?

For a brief time, I did not have choices in my recovery. My life was limited by the state system in jail. In fact, I had my choice to deny medication taken from me. I was court-ordered to medication compliance, which was encouraged by my family. I am thankful my family advocated for medication compliance because it ultimately saved my life. During the time I was not well, I recognized this only after I was medicated and educated on my health.

When I was not well four years ago, I believed I was a victim of conspiracy. I thought someone in my family were playing a prank and took me to an enclosed facility with routines not of my own (jail). I believed others were against me and working together to poison me and to spy on me; I felt my life was in danger, and that I had reason to feel uneasy and suspicious. As a result, I did not speak much, shower, or eat at all. I feared someone tampered with my soap and believed it would burn my skin. All the while I thought I was okay, and did not take medication.

After refusing medication one day a group of guards along with a nurse barged into my space, held me down to the bed and gave me a shot. I refused to take medication several times after that and we went through the forced medication routine regularly. Eventually, I complied with the nurse's request and took the pills because I did not want to receive a shot. The nurses did not tell me why I was forced to take the pills, what was my mental health condition, or what the medication was.

Soon I felt some uncomfortable side effects to these pills and did not want to take them. The nurses knew why I did not want to take the medication, but bribed me with candy and beverages to take them anyway. Now, I wonder why didn't the nurses advocate for me and take my concerns to my doctor, or maybe they did with no further instruction, I don't know.

The pills interfered with my sleep, made me feel excited and jittery. I complained to my doctor with no solution. Eventually, I found an alternative route to have my concerns met. I talked to another doctor after my doctor was off shift. This helped, the other doctor gave me another medication to relieve the side effects.

One day, I asked the nurse for information on my medication. And I learned of the type of medication I was on and additional information. While reading a magazine I came across an advertisement for medication. It listed similar experiences as symptoms and I took the advertisement to my doctor to request a medication change. My doctor said no because it was not in my best interest to switch medication for several reasons including stabilization. I felt like I was not being heard and did not have any control over my recovery.

This feeling of lack of control in my recovery changed when I went to the state hospital. For the first time a doctor asked me what I wanted. They gave me options and I made a choice, which we agreed upon. Moreover, they suggested I get off the medication my jail doctor put me on because of my family's medical history. I felt like my opinion mattered and that I was in control of my recovery.

Since that hospital visit I continue to play an active role in my recovery. After I was released from the correctional facility and institution I joined a county program that offered housing among other services. My mother enabled me to make the decision to move into a group home, commonly called independent living, despite her concerns. I was in control of my recovery and life.

My treatment team enabled me to go back to college, because it was my goal. When I moved back to Atlanta with family, they suggested activities, but did not force me to do anything I was not ready for. Eventually, I got frustrated with limited social support from the community and made the decision to go to the support groups offered at my treatment center to meet people and to make friends.

I am in control of my recovery and life. I say that because treatment teams, family, and others enabled me to have options and to make a final decision that I wanted and needed at that moment in my life. Now, I live alone, I am attending college, and I lead support groups to give back to my peers and the mental health community.

Self-direction in a person's life is essential to recovery. I experienced empowerment by being able to make decisions, and I want my peers to have the option to do the same. I am an advocate for my peers by sharing my personal recovery story, and sharing resources and information to reduce stigma.

This week I completed the Georgia Certified Peer Specialist (CPS) training. The priority of a CPS is to give the individual living with a diagnosis a voice. As a peer, someone also living with a mental health diagnosis, a CPS listens to the individual and advocates for them to their treatment team. The role of a CPS is a growing movement that is established in several states across the United States.

Finally, Embracing My Mind, Inc., a mental health organization that offers peer support will have education-based recovery support groups open to the public at the East Point Library in East Point, Georgia starting Thursday, September 8, 2011. Please go to the website click here for schedule information and additional details. The objective of Embracing My Mind, Inc. is to reduce stigma, change perceptions, and to promote awareness and hope.

To learn more information about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Choices in Recovery, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Sunlight Village Mental Health Conference

2011-06-25T11:21:00.006-04:00

Thank you, Sunlight Village Board of Directors, staff, and volunteers! I had a great experience at your mental health conference: Our Children, Our Future, on Saturday, June 18, 2011. I appreciate all your warm welcomes and support. It is nice to know I have friends in Dayton, Ohio. I would love to work with Sunlight Village again in the future! (The picture to the left, shows myself and Founder and Executive Director of Sunlight Village, Robbie Brandon)

At the conference, I delivered the speech, The Gift of Recovery: A Consumer's Perspective. I shared my personal recovery story from the diagnosis of Schizophrenia until the present. I went into detail about my recovery process because I wanted others to understand that recovery is a life-long journey that takes work, persistence, and support. I enjoyed the interaction with the audience.

NAMI New Jersey 2011 Conference- My Experience

2011-06-04T23:53:00.006-04:00

Dr. Rebecca Roma and myself attended the NAMI New Jersey conference: "Shaping the Future of Mental Healthcare," which took place earlier today. NAMI New Jersey screened the new Schizophrenia documentary that we were both featured in called, "Living with Schizophrenia: A Call for Hope and Recovery." We were accompanied by a few Janssen executives and associates, Janssen funded and produced the documentary. It was a pleasure meeting Dr. Roma because I discovered some of her volunteer work projects and reason for getting in the medical field among other interesting conversation.

I had a great experience! I listened to some great speakers and among them was Dr. Robin Eubanks, who had a lot humor, energy, and really got the audience talking- it was interactive. Also I was able to get my questions answered in a workshop, "Choices in Recovery" (a Janssen program) about Schizophrenia. Overall, I had an amazing experience- having the opportunity to meet Dr. Roma and to be a part a wonderful documentary and NAMI New Jersey conference.

For more info about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Encourage Each Other

2011-05-13T23:03:00.001-04:00

Five years ago I was living an ordinary college student life. I did not anticipate a battle with mental health, nor did my family. In fact, I do not think anyone living with a mental health diagnosis anticipates a struggle with mental illness.

However, during the process my family and supporters held my hand through my experience with Schizophrenia and gave me hope. I am fortunate and blessed to have their support. I started a mental health outreach group, Embracing My Mind, Inc., because I would like to encourage others to have hope. I want to give back to the community and to support other peoples' recovery process so that we can "overcome mental illness together!"

Thank You

Now, I am overcoming Schizophrenia with the support of my community: family, faith-based group, treatment team, peers, professional associates, and you, my readers. I am grateful especially for my mother, because she supported me during our most difficult trials with this illness. For caregivers and family members, I am sure you can relate.

For me, the illness led me to believe that family was against me to the extent that I believed that they were even trying to harm me in some incidences. At one time, I was very upset with them for reasons that do not make sense, and that I cannot recall. My mother is my number #1 supporter, thank you, Mom, for your unconditional love and support, I could not have excelled in recovery without your special touch. Thank you!

I have come a long way in my recovery, but I did not do it on my own. I had a plethora of support. I want to acknowledge treatment groups who have helped me along the way, but I understand that they may want to remain anonymous and I respect that. To those nurses, doctors, social workers, and other treatment team members that have directly worked with me especially when my illness was most severe- Thank you. Thank you: for checking on me, sending me to the emergency room, talking me into medication compliance, encouraging me to get out of my comfort zone or room, insisting that I tend to personal hygiene, educating me about my illness, etc., etc. You saved my life, and I appreciate all of you!

Be Supportive

With that said, I encourage all of us to support each other, we all need encouragement whether we have a mental health condition or not. I, like many of you, remember certain teachers, coaches, and other community mentors who have spoke hope into my life and who have encouraged me to push forward, and thus, impacted my life.

People living with a mental health concern especially need our support because there are so many misconceptions around mental illness. In other words, stigma or negative perceptions carried out in daily conversation, media, etc.

We can support the mental health community by donating to advocacy groups, volunteering, listening and talking to individuals with a mental health concern with respect, and correcting others when they speak inappropriately about mental illness. We can write letters to media groups to voice our opinion about the good and the bad images they portray about people living with mental health.

It takes a community to build people up, my experiences is just one of many stories, who are overcoming mental illness. If you have a mental illness I encourage you to seek treatment or to continue to mature in your recovery.

As a group leader, I've heard too often the lack of support people receive from family members. Therefore, I encourage others to seek out support and resources by participating in support groups. Support groups are meetings for people living with a mental health diagnosis who share experiences and offer support to each other.

Embracing My Mind, Inc. provides education-based recovery support groups in the Atlanta area to shelters, rehabilitation centers, transitional housing programs, and other community-based groups. Our goal is to reduce stigma, change perceptions, and to promote awareness.

Schizophrenia Documentary

My personal experience with the illness is one of three stories featured in a Schizophrenia documentary called, Living with Schizophrenia: A Call for Hope and Recovery. It portrays a positive image of what someone living with the condition can do for themselves, and for the community, with treatment and support.

The 25-minute film offers hope for those affected by Schizophrenia, and I want everyone to see this documentary because it vocalizes the untold stories of recovery, which can be possible for a lot of us living with mental health. I think this project was a great production by Janssen, a pharmaceutical company, that promotes positive images of people living with an illness, unlike many other films that show too much of the suffering and struggle, which we, individuals, living with the condition can most definitely recall, as well as caregivers, family members and other supporters. For more info on the documentary visit: www.hopeandrecoveryfilm.com

More Schizophrenia Info

To learn more about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

"Living with Schizophrenia" Documentary Premiere

2011-05-07T02:54:00.008-04:00

The premiere of the documentary, Living with Schizophrenia: A Call for Hope and Recovery was an amazing experience! My personal journey in mental health recovery was one of three stories featured in the documentary.

As a participant in the documentary I had an opportunity to serve on a panel discussion to share more information about the journey in my ongoing recovery. The panel discussion was moderated by JC Hayward, and the panelists included: Dave, Caregiver, Emily, director of the documentary, Ashley Smith, Mentor, Joshua Bell, Peer Counselor, and Rebecca Phillips, Writer.

The half hour film depicts the lives of three individuals living with Schizophrenia. I was united with some the other individuals who are featured in the film, in addition to the director of the documentary who also has a personal connection to the illness.

For me, the documentary portrays a message that Schizophrenia can be a very manageable illness and people living with the mental condition can lead normal lives. I believe this film will help reduce stigma and offer a lot of encouragement to people living with a mental health challenge, and also to family members, caregivers, and others. The film is very educational because it addresses some the misconceptions and myths associated with Schizophrenia, discusses some treatments, and symptoms.

The premiere of the documentary took place in Washington D.C. on May 6, 2011. The film which is funded and produced by Janssen pharmaceutical company aims to increase awareness and to reduce fear and stigma.

To see the half hour documentary, Living with Schizophrenia: A Call for Hope and Recovery visit www.hopeandrecoveryfilm.com.

The Importance of Peer Support To Me

2011-04-28T12:05:00.004-04:00

Peer support is not a new phenomenon in recovery. According to the NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course manual, Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) groups and their 12-step model have been practicing peer support since the 1930s. Peer support is when an individual with similar concerns share knowledge and practical experience with each other to have a better understanding of their concerns and to mature in recovery.

As a person living with mental illness, a facilitator, and researcher, it is common for a person living with a mental health diagnosis to also have a substance abuse concern. This combination of concerns is called dual diagnosis.

Even though I do not have a substance abuse concern I feel like I can relate to people with substance abuse concerns. From my experience with mental illness I once lost close relationships, college education, and my livelihood. Similarly, people with substance abuse concerns may have lost close relationships, career, and their livelihood as a result of using drugs and/or alcohol.

Peer support is very important to my recovery. It played a critical role in my mental health recovery foundation. When I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia in 2007, I participated in recovery support groups with peers (people who also have a mental health diagnosis) in the state hospital and in an outpatient treatment center where I received services. When I had a concern with isolation I turned to recovery support groups to overcome that challenge. I participated in recovery support groups to gain more knowledge about Schizophrenia and to build relationships.

There are a combination of habits I perform to stay well- I take my prescribed medication regularly, I participate in and also facilitate recovery support groups, and I give and get support from various sources including family, faith-based community, peers, and treatment team. For me, this approach works, however, I understand that everyone is different and other people may use another approach to obtain stability, wellness, and maturity in their recovery. I encourage treatment (whatever that may include) for a person in recovery to reach their well being.

I understand I am fortunate to have a lot of support because some of my peers do not have a diverse network of support. Therefore, I encourage peers to aim for more support through participation in support groups and building a better relationship with their treatment team (i.e. psychiatric doctor, psychologist, therapists, social worker, mentor/Certified Peer Specialists, etc.). NAMI provides FREE support groups for people living with a mental health challenge, and also for family members and caregivers.

Regardless, if an individual has a mental illness or not, we all need support! We need support in school, on the job, in our family, and among our peers. If someone is not ready to go to a support group I also encourage online support groups, which NAMI also provides or anonymous conference calls (Schizophrenia and Related Disorders Alliance of America provides).

To learn more about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Lack of Trust: A Byproduct of My Mental Illness

2011-04-12T10:30:00.001-04:00

In this entry, I'll share my experiences with Schizophrenia in regards to feeling lack of trust in others, paranoia, and isolation.... I remember my many episodes with Schizophrenia where I felt uneasy because of lack of trust in others. In the past, isolation was a giant bullying me around.

Sometimes my mind would take me to a place of fear, hurt, and an unsettling spirit, which started with what seemed like a strange look, or a different feeling around an individual, when in reality it was another symptom of my undiagnosed illness- paranoia. My paranoia was rampant and dictated my life prior to experiencing a crisis, which led me to jail and into forced treatment and to receive an official diagnosis of Schizophrenia in 2007.

In other words, my illness created enemies in my mind. For instance, I once believed my favorite kin was against me and I felt like she wanted me to fail, and I eventually thought she was conspiring to harm me. However, she never said anything to imply these feelings of distrust. My illness attacked those closest to me. I felt like there were barriers or issues between us, when in reality there wasn't. My paranoia and lack of trust grew against other members of family and friends, and ultimately to the world.

One day I had a revelation that everyone was against me, because I was special or had special abilities. I needed to escape! I quit my job, cashed my last check, packed my bag and left the house in hopes of renting a room in a nearby community. When the room for rent situation failed I wanted to leave the state and go back home.

However, because my symptoms were severe I ended up committing a crime and being jailed. After I was in jail and my family discovered where I was they visited me. But instead of me being happy to see them in my situation, I was skeptical; I believed they were impostures- I did not trust them and was hesitant to speak. I felt alone, trapped, and concerned. I thought someone had done something to my family. Therefore, I questioned my family before I had an open discussion with them. I asked distinct questions, for instance, I asked my grandparents what gifts they brought me for my high school graduation which was three years prior to the jail incident. Whenever, my family got a question wrong I believed they were in fact impostures and I felt very uncomfortable and distrusting.

Later, I was angry at my family because I thought they did something offensive to me- I do not remember why I was so upset back then. While in jail, I remember people telling the date, but I did not believe them. My illness made me distant and skeptical over anything and everything. For example, instead of believing someone else's word on what the date was, I thought God was sending me messages of the date and other things through milk cartoons. This shows how irrational my thoughts were at the time.

Eventually, the nurses in the psychiatric unit in jail gave me pills for my mental illness. I refused the medicine because I did not understand that my symptoms were symptoms of mental illness, and that I was experiencing an episode or a psychotic break. After they forced medicated me or I gave in a took the medication and was educated about my illness in the state hospital, I yearned for family and friends again.

However, I still had to learn to overcome isolation. I wanted to have friends outside of family, I wanted to get out of the house, and I wanted to learn more about my illness. Therefor, I started attending support groups led by my therapist at the center where I received treatment. I went to all the groups they offered which was about three groups a week. And I started building relationships with others again. After that I started volunteering and then I went back to college. However, I must emphasize that this was a process that I am still learning, it was NOT an overnight recovery plan. I consider my recovery an ongoing treatment plan that must include participation in various support groups, support from family and peers, and medication compliance.

I share these experiences with you to promote awareness on the symptoms of Schizophrenia, emphasize the importance of trust, and to spread the idea that hope and recovery are possible.

If you are someone living with a mental illness I encourage you to find someone who you can trust so that they can advocate for you. If you are a family member or friend of a person living with a mental illness it is important to gain or keep the trust of your loved one. I would suggest that you stay open minded when they share bizarre experiences with you, journal about it and support them in order to get them into treatment- any sort of treatment (i.e., therapies, medication, etc.) or to continue treatment.

For more information on Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

NABJ Panel on Schizophrenia Awareness-- The Experience

2011-03-24T23:43:00.003-04:00

Today I participated on a National Association of Black Journalists (NABJ) panel on Schizophrenia awareness in Washington D.C. My fellow panelists included: Judge Arthur Burnett, Sr., Annelle Primm, M.D., M.P.H., Xavier Amador, PhD, Jennifer Ayers-Moore, and Jennifer Pifer-Bixel, and moderator Vicki Mabrey (and with us in the photograph are some of Janssen's executives). Here is a summary of the panel discussion...

We discussed a range of Schizophrenia information: the basics or symptoms, myths, and personal testimonies. More specifically, we mentioned the need for more education and success stories in the media. Additionally, "Assertive Community Treatment (A.C.T.)" groups were discussed in regards to helping people living with a diagnosis stay involved in their treatment and to get the necessary resources to move forward in their recovery. "ACT" teams generally consist of a group of health care professionals that assist people in the healing process. Another group that was mentioned to help people stay involved in the community were: "Mental Health Courts." Mental Health Courts were developed for people who had encounters with law enforcement or jail system, mental illness, substance abuse, and/or HIV/AIDS, to stay connected to the community.

Religious beliefs and delusions (having false beliefs) was another topic. I shared experiences regarding my faith and how I did not recognize the signs of mental illness because I thought I was spiritually gifted like the people in the Bible. In short, I thought I had the gift of discernment, whereas, I could decipher "evil" spirits and "good" spirits within people. In addition to that, I did not know what a mental illness was, and I did not recognize that I needed support from a professional because I lacked insight.

Some panelists emphasized that support is crucial to a person's recovery as well as treatment, which I most definitely am in agreement with. A member of the panel even stressed that insight into one's illness was not essential to reach a state of wellness, and that relationships are key to recovery.

One barrier to treatment for some members of the black community were addressed. Some people feel like doctors are not culturally sensitive enough to help them cope with their concerns. However, there are programs being established to encourage and mentor youth black students to get involved in the medical field in order to develop a medical career in the future. One of the ways the program strives to reduce barriers to treatment is to enhance the growth of more black medical specialists to help support the needs of the community.

Finally, with the assumption that media perpetuates misconceptions about mental illnesses, panelists encouraged journalists to also bring attention to people overcoming the illness and educating the public about mental health. Yes, in some incidents people living with a diagnosis may be involved in a crime, however, journalists can also educate the public about the facts through success stories.

Overall, I had a wonderful experience serving on the panel along side influential members and contributors to the mental health field. I felt supported by each member on the panel. I feel honored to have played a role in the panel discussion and to have served on the program along side my fellow panelists. For more information on the NABJ event visit the website at www.nabj.org.

To learn more information about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Whose to Blame

2011-03-11T09:35:00.001-05:00

Whose to blame for my mental illness? Is it me, is you?... I presented a NAMI In Our Own Voice program for another Crisis Intervention Team (CIT) class yesterday. After the presentation, one of the class participants came to me and told me he felt responsible for my mental health. He worked at my old college and felt like he or someone from the institution should have been there for me when the symptoms of Schizophrenia seemed to have got the best of me. While I attended that school, I did not have insight into my mental health. In fact, I did not even know what a mental illness was!

Even when the symptoms of Schizophrenia tormented me, I did not know it was beyond my control. Many times, I prayed and meditated for peace of mind and for the angels to protect me as I go to my destination. I was very religious and had delusions that I was prophet of God. I prayed for protection because I felt like I was fighting a spiritual battle everyday. In other words, spiritual welfare between me and the world.

Back then in school, I felt emotionally exhausted, and I also felt like a victim because I thought professors and peers were gossiping about me. I was extremely paranoid. Paranoia is another symptom of Schizophrenia in my experience with the illness. Eventually, I began to hate my school, because I did not feel like I can connect with my peers anymore. I also isolated from family because I did not think that would understand my concerns.

Despite my frustration and lack of understanding as to what was happening to me, I never blamed anyone or myself for that matter for my mental illness when I did become aware of my diagnosis. If anything I just wanted to strive for my old life- college, family life, and independence.

Should we blame community, family, friends, and ourselves for mental illness? What about the good Samaritan idea. If we see someone who looks disoriented or distant should it be up to us to check on them and seek resources and support for them?

I remember while I was going through an episode before I was diagnosed with Schizophrenia, I was hearing voices and wondering about aimlessly. I called family and friends on the phone at a gas station, but the voices continued to infringe on my livelihood. While outside a stranger confronted me. He gave me a ride to a nearby mall at my request and then called the police because I seemed disoriented and confused. When the police confronted me they did not understand what was going on so they called my family and sent me home. Thinking about that incident, I think the man was acting as a good Samaritan. I am glad that he called the police because I would not have known how to return home, because my symptoms were so bad. However, I wish that police officer was trained to distinguish someone with a mental health concern, it may have prevented or helped in my crisis stage.

If we all acted as good Samaritans can we make a difference in someone's recovery from mental health?.... I do not believe that we, or I should, blame others for my mental illness because there is no known cause for the diagnosis and it does not have anything to do with my character. A common misconception about the illness is that it is caused by dysfunctional families or poor parenting- this is NOT true. Schizophrenia is brain disease and its causes are unknown. However, genetics and environmental factors do play a role in the onset of the illness.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

To Hope Again: My Recovery Story by Rebecca Lyn Phillips

2011-02-24T07:55:00.003-05:00

The following story was written by Rebecca Lyn Phillips, my new friend in recovery.

I’d always wanted to write. I started out a published author in 1994 with a book for teen girls, entitled “Heart to Heart.” Twenty thousand were sold. I was happy about my success, but there was something else going on in my life that I didn’t want to talk to my family about.

In 1994 I attended Kansas State University, planning to work towards a Ph.D. in Psychology. I wanted to open up a home for abused teens. I wanted to make a difference. While at K-State, however, I began to struggle with a thought and mood disorder called schizo-affective disorder. I stayed in bed in my dorm and I started to miss classes. I wanted to be in Topeka in my nice, little bed at home, not at school with all those people and deadlines. I was very depressed and everyone around me knew it, except for me.

October came and I started to lose weight. I had always been slender, but now I was missing meals at the cafeteria and I was very thin. My roommate, a friend from high school, was concerned. I started to wander around campus, aimlessly, without a direction. Finally, I went to a counselor on campus and she said maybe I could go back home. I wanted to: I wanted to be with my family and to sleep forever.

I called my dad. He came to pick me up. I felt like a failure. I didn’t know what to do. When I returned to my home in Topeka, I slept a lot and had to be hospitalized. It was the beginning of many hospital stays and I wanted to make it go away. The disorder clouded my thinking, my responses, and my emotions. I couldn’t move and I could hardly talk at times. While at the hospital, I gained strength and I met others who helped me see I wasn’t alone. I knew I was made for a purpose and through activities at the hospitals I went to all throughout the 90’s, I learned my mind could heal. I feel it has in many ways.

Now I attend groups during the day at a center in Topeka. I also have learned to be forthright about my emotions with my family. My dad and I are talking again and he and I email a lot about the day’s happenings. My mom and I attend a family support group every other Wednesday with other families and it has been great at helping us communicate better. My sister lives in Utah and she calls me and encourages me. I still feel guilty that she had to see all my pain but she’s okay about it and has her own friends.

Through my writing I gain strength. I now have a blog for cjonline. I talk about people in the community who make a difference—who care. There are people who make a difference in my life of recovery and those people I know do care. They care very much. Sometimes I feel ashamed about my thoughts and emotions, especially when they overtake me. My friends and family don’t always know what to do. I’ve gone to the hospital so many times I want to say, “no more!” My writing gives me an escape from the hospital blues. Every time I think of when I was strapped down or locked up in the name of treatment, I go to my writing and find a cause to help others who have experienced similar treatment. I know there are good hospitals and that a lot is being learned about how to treat vulnerable, mentally ill people. The ways of old need to go and new ways need to come up. That is happening and I am happy to be a part of it.

I would say I have recovered to a major degree. I still have anger and depression at times, but I have hope. This hope carries me through the bad times when I want to sleep in and not go anywhere or when I want to scream because I have to have a payee. I don’t feel accepting of all these supports in my life, but I know they are there for a purpose. So this hope carries me and defines me and I hope in my smile one can see a new me—a person who has suffered and is learning to be one with herself and give to others and try again. To me, that’s what my recovery is all about.

Trapped in my Schizophrenia: A Glimpse of my College Journal

2011-02-19T18:52:00.005-05:00

Schizophrenia for me, is characterized by hallucinations (specifically the voices and visions of people or ghosts), thoughts of people gossiping about me, following me, or trying to poison me, and false beliefs or delusions...

As I reviewed old college journal entries it saddened me how prevalent my diagnosis of Paranoid Schizophrenia was. Certain phrases gave indication that Schizophrenia was dominate and slowly getting worse. I relied on God to relieve my stressful situations. Now, I will share with you some thoughts I had that I wrote about in my college journal while I was a sophomore and/or junior.

Stress played an intricate role in my symptoms that surfaced. On February 26, 2006, I wrote: "...Although I have been under a lot of stress due to financial, car, and professor conflicts, everything is okay...." Most of the time I tried to stay positive. However, I was obsessed with the idea that someone or some group of college students were gossiping about me. On March 11, 2006, I wrote: "...I have the feeling that people are gossiping about me..."

Eventually, I did not trust anybody including my closest friends, and I began to isolate myself. These thoughts and actions are portrayed in the following journal entries: (March 12, 2006) "...I am at peace with myself I do not feel bad about deteriorating relationships at school..." I went on further to write on March 23, 2006: "... I am blessed because I know I cannot trust any of my closest friends with my secrets..." As you can imagine, not being able to share information with other people, or even your best friend, can make a person feel trapped... I felt trapped, and I did not understand why.

The belief that others were talking about me behind my back got worse to include a group of individuals outside of my initial circle of support. On March 31, 2006, I wrote: "...I think I am certain of who the main gossipers are- [I listed several names]..."

Back then, I remember whenever I was under a lot of stress, (which was a lot), I would take a walk around campus (I lived on the college campus), no matter what time of night. For instance, I took a lot of late night walks just before and during finals week. During these walks, I sometimes heard voices or people laughing (at me). I rationalized the voices by believing that I had extremely good hearing, and I assumed my friends were laughing at me in secret, which made me withdraw from them and eventually everyone else.

In my mind, the stress got so bad that I needed to take a break from school. A year after the listed journal entries, I withdrew from all college courses during my junior year in March 2007. I felt like I lost my drive, focus, and motivation to complete assignments, and to even go class.

I must emphasize that during the time I journaled, I did not know I was living with a mental illness. Also, even though my faith seemed to help me get through some difficult times, my mental illness was not prayed away, and I have learned that it cannot be willed away, or slept away. (I am not by any means suggesting that divine intervention or miracles are not possible). How to treat a person's mental illness should be discussed with a mental health professional.

Now, I no longer feel trapped by my Schizophrenia. I have friends and relatives who I can trust. As I do research on the illness and remember situations from my past, or read old journal entries, I am able to distinguish reality from delusions... I am still putting together the pieces, which is refreshing to me- to know the difference. More important, I am back in college!

To learn more about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Messages of Hope

2011-02-18T17:02:00.002-05:00

Don't let Schizophrenia steal your joy! If you or someone you know is living with Schizophrenia or any mental illness there is hope. Schizophrenia is a manageable illness, like other medical conditions, with treatment and support.

Hope to me is to hear my own voice and only my voice when I am alone. I am thankful that I tried something that manages my hallucinations and other symptoms. I am hopeful that others living with Schizophrenia may find the treatment that works for them too. And hopeful that society will find solutions to many complications associated with the cause, or causes of the illness, and to find better treatment or a cure for this concern.

Someone with Schizophrenia can live a "normal" life in recovery, which is an on-going process to manage this illness. There is no set time frame for recovery. And, I will say this again, there is no set time frame for recovery, everyone is different and may require unique avenues to reach stability despite one's challenging illness.

I am a genuine example of someone successfully managing Schizophrenia! I am still in recovery, still putting together the pieces of my past realities or product of symptoms, and I am still learning myself like many other people who may not have a diagnosis.

What helped in my recovery is treatment, hope from family and health care professionals, and education, education, education! Here are some websites on Schizophrenia and other mental illnesses:

Yes, Schizophrenia scared me, yes, Schizophrenia stole meaningful relationships from me, and yes, Schizophrenia even had the audacity to take away daily choices from me... but today, I am overcoming Schizophrenia, and you can too!

To learn more about Schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Mindful of Present Symptoms

2011-02-18T15:25:00.004-05:00

Some of the symptoms and side effects of my medication that I still struggle with are lack of facial responsiveness and seeming to walk a little stiff. Because other people have told me about these symptoms and side effects of my medication I try to overcome them.

While I am speaking to someone I may intentionally blink my eyes so that I don't seem to stare off, and I smile more. Occasionally, I nod my head so that the person I am talking to knows that I am following with whatever they are saying. And, I may turn away and then look back. Now, I have mastered these movements.

A major side effect for the medication I am taking was stiffness. When I first started my medication regimen in 2007, my peers said I looked like a robot. However, I did not feel stiff, but doctors and others noticed how I walked. In fact, my doctor gave me another medication to help counteract the stiffness. Now, I am not taking the other medicine because the side effects have seemed to fade away over time. To overcome the appearance that I am a little stiff I slightly swing my arms when I walk, which helps tremendously. Moreover, I take my medicine at night in hopes that the stiffness will decrease. Even though I manage these little things very well, I am mindful of them and continue to work at it.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Overview of My Experiences: Overcoming Schizophrenia

2011-02-09T16:48:00.001-05:00

I have had this blog for over two years and feel honored to share my experiences and suggestions with you. I love to write and am striving to help others in advocating for mental health, in order to reduce stigma, promote awareness, and to continue to share my testimony so that other people living with a mental health diagnosis understand that they are not alone, and that support is available if they seek it. Now, I am in school to learn how to become a therapist, and I oversee a non-profit organization I established called, Embracing My Mind, Inc.

It is unfortunate that some people, including myself, have to endure an extreme chaotic situation or crisis, before getting the treatment we need. In addition to the ordinary stresses of life, in my experience, I suffered a nervous breakdown at the age of 20 that resulted in my arrest and hospitalization as a result of my unknown mental illness, Paranoid Schizophrenia. It is important to acknowledge the fact that I was and still am very involved in my community. I was a youth church teacher, assistant coach for the youth, student mentor in college, and a poll worker for the presidential election before the adult-onset schizophrenia disrupted my life. My family and I did not understand mental illness, its seems to have crept up on us, and stole my livelihood, personality, relationships, and ultimately my mind, before I started the recovery process.

The illness terrified myself, family, especially my mother, because she did not know if I would be able to function again. During my most challenging experiences with schizophrenia, I experienced auditory and visual hallucinations, the voices, sometimes only one, other times multiple voices, were discouraging and told me that 'I was a dishonor to my family,' the voices were cruel and confusing, especially because I thought the voices were coming from the people around me.

And the images, I'll never forget the thought and fear I had, that I was being followed. One of the images were of a man on an antique bicycle, it dreadful, no matter how hard I tried, I could not escape him, it was scary! I became extremely paranoid to the extent that I stopped eating because I thought others were trying to poison me. Eventually, I stopped taking care of myself, speaking, and even moving.

I thought the devil was communicating to me through the television and radio, trying to persuade me to commit suicide. Imagine watching a church service on T.V. and at the end of the program you see the words "How to Commit Suicide" on the screen to order tapes! it frightened me. Other times I thought I felt the devil's presence in people around and even in church, which was not a good feeling. I am glad I received treatment when I did before those thoughts got any worse, or before I acted on them.

Also, I believed I could read people's minds, and they read my mind as well- it was all confusing and exhausting. Eventually, I had no recollection of where I was, I thought family members were impostures, and my personality fluctuated depending on the severity of my delusions, which were bizarre.

I am thankful to be able to do the things I want and need to do. Also, I am thankful for treatment and all involved in my recovery (God, family, peers, NAMI, online friends and supporters like you, and health care professionals). I appreciate the opportunity to share my story with you, it is therapeutic to me and I hope beneficial to you, too. I encourage you to partake in whatever helps you or your loved one's recovery (i.e., therapy, support groups, journaling, hobbies, meditation on higher power, family and friends, etc.). My episodes and encounters around my experience with mental health are all true.

Event Announcement: NAMI In Our Own Voice Presentation

2011-02-09T14:40:00.004-05:00

I am excited to announce that myself and K.C. Jones (her blog, Hope Is Real) will present our experience with mental health, TONIGHT at Charis Bookstore & More!! The NAMI In Our Own Voice presentation will be located at 1189 Euclid Avenue, Atlanta, Georgia, at 7:30-9PM. This event is sponsored by Charis Bookstore & More and Circle of Grace Community Church. All are welcome, hope to see you there!

For more information about the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) programs visit the website.

New Year, New Goals by Princess B.

2011-01-22T10:53:00.001-05:00

Hello everyone. It's a new year and a new start for you and for me. For me, it's developing personally this year. Like many of you out there this new year will bring about new goals for ourselves. I have vowed to let this year be a year of completion and follow through to many of my goals. One where I complete projects I've started as far back as a year or two ago. It also means staying connected to NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) and the mental health community and being financially savvy. What are some of your goals--the ones you don't mind sharing or that are of pressing concern to you?

Be Blessed,

Princess B.

My Acceptance with Mental Illness

2011-01-20T19:52:00.001-05:00

Acceptance to me is when a person recognizes they have a mental illness and then takes ownership of their recovery by meeting the needs of their mental health concern (i.e., medication, therapy, and/or other forms of treatment). Acceptance for me did not come easy. Now I will share with you how I started receiving treatment, why I initially refused it, and who helped me accept my diagnosis of Paranoid Schizophrenia.

Initially, I was forced into treatment, mandated by a judge to medication compliance. Therefore, whenever I refused to take my medication a group of staff would barge into my room, pin me down to the bed while the nurse administered a shot. We followed this routine for a few days till I gave in and took the pills they gave me.

In the beginning, I did not take the medication for several reasons: 1) I did not believe I needed them, nobody told me I had schizophrenia they just started giving me medicine one day, 2) I had a history of enduring allergies and other less severe illnesses without medication, and 3) I did not want to make the medication "weaken" my spiritual gifts. In other words, I lacked insight into what was actually happening to me- I was falling a part- I had had a nervous breakdown or psychotic break. I did not see myself failing to take care of personal hygiene, not engaging in activities and conversation with others (isolation and poverty of speech), or notice the fact that I would stay in one position for long periods of time (catatonic).

Growing up, I let colds and allergies fade away on its own. I did not want to be dependent on medication unless it was very serious like the flu. Lastly, when I noticed a change in my ability to read people's minds or to read into their spirit whether they were good or evil, I felt like the medication was interfering with my God-given talents. When in truth, the medication was bringing me back to reality!

After finally giving in and taking the medicine, another problem occurred... The SIDE EFFECTS. I would sleep all day everyday. I missed out on group therapy and free time with peers. On top of that I was extremely hungry to the state of not being able to focus, can you imagine?!

Moreover, a downside to another medication was lack of sleep. I could not sleep because I felt compelled to move about, this was restless legs. After experiencing restless legs I did not want to take my medication. (This is one of many reasons why some other people with a mental illness may not want to take their medication). I complained to staff about my new condition (restless legs) but with no avail until I caught the attention of another doctor. In the meantime, nurses bribed me into taking my medicine with candy and juice, which was a treat in jail.

Finally, a medication that controlled the symptoms with a more tolerable outcome... Stiffness. I did not feel stiff, however, medical staff would ask me how I felt and would move my limbs to test for any discomfort, because, well, I walked like a "robot!" This is what my peers called me.

Then the "talk." My doctor told me my official diagnosis- Paranoid Schizophrenia... but wait! I was NOT devastated, because I was blessed with a great doctor, let me tell you why he was great... He had a passion for helping patients. He explained what the symptoms of schizophrenia was and applied them to my specific situation. He said my illness was to explain all the symptoms I was experiencing- the voices, delusions, etc., which made me feel a little relieved, but wait this is not the only reason why he was a great psychologist.

I had a great doctor because he believed in me and in my recovery. He had hope for me! He told me that I can return to college as long as I managed my stress and take my medication regularly. He said I can lead a normal life as long as I did these things. His faith in my recovery gave me HOPE that I can do it! And now I am...

Currently, I am attending college part-time. I also volunteer and do a lot of community service in the mental health field. I live independently, cook for myself, take my medication regularly, manage my bills, etc. with the support of family, peers, and treatment team.

If you, or a loved one, is living with a mental illness there is hope. For me it began with Acceptance- meeting the demands of my mental illness in order to get well and to stay well. I take my medication as prescribed, participate in several support groups a week, and stay connected to my support circle- family, peers, and health care professionals.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Tonight's Support Group Meeting

2011-01-18T20:09:00.003-05:00

I just got back from a NAMI support group. It was a very good meeting we covered a lot information related to coping with mental health, our attitude toward stigma, and various bizarre experiences. Afterward, I felt energized, uplifted, and empowered like the way church makes me feel, it was very good. I really enjoyed the company of my friends who are also in recovery from different mental illnesses. I look forward to next week's meeting!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

The Hospital Stay (Continued)

2011-01-17T10:58:00.000-05:00

While I was at a California State Hospital I stayed in a coed unit of about 50 people. There were about three to four people to a room. The women were roomed on one side of hall while the men on the other. The hospital divided groups of people based on long-term stay and shorter term stays- I was among the short-term units.

I remember the intake process, which was lengthy. I endured several comprehension, medical, and personal tests. The staff wanted to know everything- my childhood experiences, schooling, knowledge of my mental illness, the reason I was there - EVERYTHING!

In the hospital, we were provided three meals a day with flexible diets if stated - vegetarian, no pork, low sodium, etc. We earned points by good behavior- going to classes, cleaning our room, dressing in an appropriate manner, and doing whatever we were supposed to. The points went toward a store where we could purchase candy, accessories, and other items.

Whenever someone got into trouble they would lose their freedom to accept visits, go outside, socialize with others by staying in a private room, use their points for the store, or participate in additional activities or meetings. Sometimes if someone where out of control they would be trapped to a bed, or transferred to another unit.

In addition to mandatory classes and conferences with the treatment team, some of the activities included: Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, church, visits to the library, talent shows, or cookouts. The class load was diverse- exercise, learning about mental health, learning about the court system, art classes, etc. The classes were taught by health care professionals - psychologists, social workers, counselors, etc. The conferences were meetings with our treatment team to decipher if we were ready to be discharged from the hospital and return to jail to complete court hearings.

I remember when I was in the hospital my anxiety level was high. I did not like being around large groups, sometimes I preferred to stay in my room. I remember being bored a lot, to pass the time I would read, write, or exercise.

I stayed active and out of trouble. I participated in just about all the activities- even the talent show! A peer, a nurse, and myself danced to a hip hop song, it was fun. At the end everyone got a prize, we were provided a large box with various items in it- candy, smell goods, etc. to choose from.

My peers were well mannered for the most part, nobody wanted their freedoms taken from them, however, there were some that caused problems, which occasionally ruined it for all of us.

Overall, my experience was not bad. I went to the state hospital to get better and to learn more about my mental illness, which I did. It was at the California State Hospital where I received an official mental health diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia. I remember my doctor discussing some of the symptoms with me and telling me that I can still go back to college and lead a fulfilling life. This gave me hope...

What are your thoughts on this?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

The Hospital Stay

2011-01-14T19:00:00.001-05:00

In my experience, I stayed in the hospital for 2-3 months to get an official mental health diagnosis, and also to regain competency for trial. I was in jail and in a state hospital for taking a military truck from the airport. Taking the truck was related to my nervous breakdown or psychotic break.

My hospital stay was productive. I reunited with my mother and family, and participated in group therapy. I was sent to a California State Hospital because my (unknown) mental illness had gotten so severe that I became catatonic- not moving my body limbs for periods at a time. I was extremely paranoid that staff would try to poison me and thus, I stopped eating and drinking. As a result, I was sent to the emergency room several times. Also, I failed a competency test for trial, in short, I was so sick that the court hearings could not proceed and the judge mandated medication compliance and a visit to the state hospital.

My illness had taken over the loving, ambitious, go-getter, Ashley. I became angry at my mother and family for no concrete reason, the illness made everyone the enemy including my very own loving and supportive family. However, my family did not give up HOPE. And when the medicine kicked in, my mother and family were there to accept me.

In the hospital, I was required to participate in diverse group therapy. Some of the classes I took included: yoga, cardio, coping with mental illness, medication education, informational court, and an art class, (I did not take all these classes in the same period, we rotated classes like mini semesters).Whenever, I was not in class I was visiting with family.

The following is a selected parts of my diary while I was staying in a California State Hospital:

Thursday, August 16, 2007
Now I am at the State Hospital and not at the psychiatric unit in jail. I am a little nervous because of my new, large surroundings. The people are friendly, but a little intimidating because the group is larger than the group I came from which was about 16 people...

Friday, August 17, 2007
Day #2 at the State Hospital. Everybody is friendly. I switched bedrooms because a couple of my peers got into a fight. Today I also gave blood and met with my social worker, nurse, program coordinator, and doctor. I took what seems like the same interview twice today and I completed a test that focused on my reading skills. For the most part the staff seems laid back, which is a good thing. All of my peers are friendly because they are very considerate... I am still adjusting to the large group, I think I will do well here. I know that He is with me always and will hold my hand through this experience.

Friday, August 31, 2007
Yesterday, my mother and me did not visit, however, we visited today and she plans on coming back this afternoon. We discussed Supplemental Security Income (SSI), my recovery, arrest, and my newborn niece, and family. My mother says she became a member of a mental illness awareness group. I thought that was courageous and proactive. She also encourages me to apply for SSI...

Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Today was my first day participating in regular classes, I took Medication Education. My social worker and psychologist taught the class, they both shared videos, and both videos were interesting. I also spoke to my aunt, I called her at work. She told me some of the details of my case... she will make a specific prayer for me that the judge will release me without felony charges. We had a good conversation. Some of the reasons that I was upset with her is most likely a part of my paranoia, we said we would discuss it in person during our visit this Sunday.

I just spoke with my mother and she is on her way. My step-father is with her... Our visit went well. My mother is moving close to the hospital in order to visit me daily. She says that she will visit me Friday and move to the area this weekend. Seeing my mother daily will make my stay here much easier. We could talk about my classes, because she wants to learn what I am learning.

Granddad will visit me tomorrow. I am excited to see him, he goes out of his way a lot too. I am blessed to have a family that cares so much.

Thursday, September 13, 2007
Today I went to Conflict Management and then I had a visit with my mother. First, in class we talked about our support system and how some people avoid their problems. We also discussed the difference between sanity and insanity. Insanity is not dealing with any problems, while sanity is. Our support system may include our peers, family, education network, and self. We had the opportunity to record our support system in different colors on circles. I used blue and purple. Second, my mother visited me earlier. She was like herself. Today she sang Christian hymns and we prayed together...

As you can tell by reading bits and pieces of my diary from the hospital stay, the hospital can be a very scary place, but it could also be a place to recuperate. My family was very supportive and hopeful that I will get better. They played an active role in my recovery from the beginning, we experienced the hospital stay together.

From the selected journal entries, a person can imagine how faith played a role in my life during this critical moment. My family and me were praying for a tolerable solution to the incident, and through faith, support- I received character references from family, church members, and others to give to the judge- and an official diagnosis, I was not convicted with a felony.

My mother became a member of a mental health support group. Both of my parents suggested that I apply for SSI. And, my hospital stay is where I gained the foundation to my recovery by learning more about my illness.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

"Thought Broadcasting" A Poem by Claudia Krizay

2011-01-02T10:20:00.001-05:00

Silence is a silver ship

Traveling at the speed of the darkness,

Black holes are the edifices in which I

Build my thoughts-

Word by word,

Each and every syllable forms upon my lips,

And then broadcasted, aloud-

Thoughts are killers- thoughts can harm-

My thoughts can be heard from afar.

Within this room I write my thoughts

With a pen that is void of ink, or a pencil

That has no lead,

Invisible they are, but somehow,

These thoughts are broadcasted aloud.

Thoughts are killers thoughts control-

My thoughts can be heard from afar.

A silver ship with its sail to the wind,

A wild horse that canters across vast terrain, or

Pebbles that roll off of my fingertips,

That splash into the creek, one by one,

You can see, you can hear, as

My thoughts, broadcasted aloud.

My thoughts can be heard from afar.

My thoughts are a flame that only I can quench.

I am in control of what comes into my mind,

As my hands build the world from

The bricks of Time,

My thoughts control the world.

My thinking destroys those, whom I abhor,

My thoughts control the downtrodden.

Silence is a silver ship, or

The dome beneath which I dwell-

I build my edifice beneath this dome.

No one dares to enter, as

I have broadcasted a message to the world,

My eyes order the world away;

My thoughts are broadcasted aloud,

A bad thought can destroy, as good ones

Create and control,

My thoughts control the world…

Claudia Krizay

Claudia Krizay lives with schizophrenia. Claudia is a part of the SchizophreniaConnection community. She has published three books which include (on xlibris.com):

"Take Five Seroquel and Call Me in the Morning"
"Far Out!"
"Time Lapse"

Welcoming the New Year with Pride in my Recovery

2011-01-01T10:58:00.001-05:00

In group on Thursday, we wrote down three things we are proud of for the year 2010, and also wrote the things we would like to be proud of for 2011. My accomplishments for 2010 included:

Going back to college,
Getting my own apartment, and
Maintaining a personal relationship.

I am proud of these things accomplishments because I've showed myself that I can lead an independent life in recovery from schizophrenia. Recovery to me is doing the things I used to do and also doing the things I need to do to move forward. Moreover, I accomplished these things despite my illness and even though certain people were skeptical about my goals, I did it and I am very proud of myself!

I have many goals I would like fulfill this year. I would like to become a Certified Peer Specialist (CPS) among other things. A CPS is a trained mental health associate who is also in mental health recovery, and who helps peers on their path to recovery. They facilitate groups, provide resources, and act as a mentor. I am already doing work as a CPS, but I have not participated in the official training yet. I plan on doing the training this summer, that way I will be eligible for a lot of jobs in the mental health field.

Finally, if you are a person living with a mental health diagnosis and I encourage you to take ownership of your recovery if you have not already done so, and to strive to accomplish your goals despite other people's doubts; and despite living with an illness such as schizophrenia.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Hopeful about finding Work

2010-12-31T09:45:00.002-05:00

I am hopeful that I will find part-time work in the mental health field. I would like to have a position that mirrors that of a Certified Peer Specialist (CPS). A CPS works directly with people who have a mental health diagnosis. They assist peers with recovery goals, facilitate groups, and act as a mentor. However, the position requires special training followed by intense testing, and certification. I plan on applying for the CPS training this summer.

Most of the jobs I am interested in requires CPS training and certification. Even though I am limited in that regard I am enthusiastic about finding work and will continue with the job search.

If you would like to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Mental Health Recovery To Me

2010-12-29T20:14:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, in group we had a discussion about recovery- what does it mean to us, how other organizations define it, and tips to reach recovery. I heard various understandings of what recovery means- change, growth, restore what was taken, etc. In addition to getting everyone;s opinion on the meaning of recovery, we read SAMHSA's 10 Fundamental Components of Recovery.

My definition of recovery is focused on action. First and foremost, recovery to me is accepting my diagnosis of schizophrenia, and taking ownership of my well being by seeking treatment and support, and getting involved in my treatment plan with health care professions. It involves speaking up about needs and asking questions. In other words, advocating for myself.

Recovery is accepting change and learning the new Ashley after receiving a mental health diagnosis- that is being real with self and capabilities by revising my needs and goals. For example, the "new Ashley" is aware of limitations as a result of the illness; I understand that I should Not work or go to college full time for the moment until I reach another phase in my recovery, which is possible!

My personal recovery plan includes sharing my knowledge with others and educating myself about mental health. Additionally, it is volunteering and performing outreach to help reduce stigma and to promote awareness.

At this point in my recovery, I am loving my recovery! Now, I am open about my diagnosis. I am comfortable with the progress I've made, however, I am continuing to strive to improve. I am hopeful that I will achieve my many goals despite living with this illness.

In my experience, my recovery has helped me mature. It has taught me some of the lessons of life that I may not have understood unless I have gone through something as intense and emotional as mental illness.

For instance, I have learned that I am not immune to a lot of things- I guess that philosophy of being immune to things comes with youth but goes away with experience and time. I would have never thought I would encounter mental illness and the things that go with it, in my experience that includes: bizarre thoughts, incarceration, and therapy; and following a regular medication regimen; and the whole recovery process, to list a few things related to mental health.

For me, recovery involved a lot of support from health care professionals, social workers, case managers, family and peers online and in-person. I am thankful for the strong foundation I experienced- the outpatient treatment program and housing arrangement, the group therapy, and NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness).

Finally, I do Not believe recovery comes with a time limit, and that it is the same journey for everyone. To me, recovery does Not equal perfection or is problem free. In my opinion, recovery does Not mean a person is "cured" of the illness. Instead, recovery is managing the mental illness which is an ongoing process that demands a lot of attention and support. However, I do believe the level of progress in one's recovery depends on the individual.

What does mental health recovery mean to you? How has recovery changed your life- whether you are a family member or a person living with a diagnosis?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

"GIving Back" with NAMI Georgia

2010-12-27T07:48:00.004-05:00

Several NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness) Georgia trainings will take place on January 28-30, 2011 at Mercer University (Atlanta campus):

Family-to-Family
Peer-to-Peer
In Our Own Voice

The Family-to-Family class is 12 weeks and is facilitated by trained family members of people living with mental health. The class provides current mental health information, teaches the family member care giver how to handle relapses and crisis, and other information to help the care giver.

Opposite that, Peer-to-Peer is for the individual living with mental health. The 10-week course educates peers on relapse prevention, advance directives, and mental health education. The class is facilitated by two trained individuals living with a mental illness.

Finally, In Our Own Voice teaches people living with a mental health concern how to share their experience with mental illness in a 60-90 minute presentation. The presentation is supported by a 15-minute DVD and is led by two presenters.

I have personally received instruction from NAMI Georgia to perform outreach and I love it! In addition to that, the training was a great experience because I met other people with the same illness as me who want to help others.

All of these trainings are FREE (includes hotel, meals, and class materials!) , however, they do require a reference and a commitment to service. For more information about these trainings visit the NAMI Georgia website.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Religious Preoccupation

2010-12-20T09:05:00.002-05:00

After a talk, a woman asked me if my faith contributed to my recovery because she noticed that I mentioned it throughout my speech. In addition to that, she told me that she observed people with faith as having a better outcome in their mental health recovery.

First, I came from a family with Christian values. My faith in God started to get intense during the latter years of high school, which in my opinion, is when I started having symptoms. In my experience religion plays a major role in my mental health- its delusions, its coping skills, and in my recovery. In medical terms they call my religious rituals and delusions "religious preoccupation."

Before I was diagnosed I was highly religious. In fact, I wanted to be an evangelist and to go to a Christian college. I would read my Bible for several hours a day throughout the day, listen to hymns, and meditate. Sometimes I would ignore people if they wanted my attention while I was meditating I was in such deep thought. Also, I would carry my Bible with me everywhere I went.

When I was delusional I assumed I was a prophet of God, and I eventually believed I was Jesus Christ. While in this state, I felt like everyone was against me and that I was being persecuted all over again like in the Bible. I sensed I had spiritual abilities where I can tell whether someone was good or evil. In the Bible this is called the gift of discernment. Those that were "evil" had black eyes, and others that were "good" glowed to me. Most of the time I sensed evil people around me which frightened me and made my anxiety level high. Also, I felt like I understood God and that I had a special relationship with Him.

To me, the Bible came alive. I started to view people as biblical characters. I believed in spiritual welfare. Spiritual welfare to me is when there is a clash in the spirits, or people, where the good and the bad do not get along. Things happen like gossiping, and cursing arise from spiritual welfare. I felt like I was in the mist of spiritual welfare and that I was a spiritual warrior.

I think that having an undiagnosed mental disorder made my religious practices go to an extreme. In other words, I was obsessed with religion. Like I said earlier, I read my Bible several times a day, and I attended church services a few times a week. And whenever, I did not do my pray or ritual in the order that I usually did it I knew I would have a bad day.

Part of my delusions involved the devil trying to get me to commit suicide. After watching a church service on television I saw the words "how to commit suicide" in the section to order tapes and CDs. This startled me and forced me to turn off the television. That same day I heard a hip-hop song on the radio that suggested to me that the devil wants me to commit suicide. I ignored the music and viewed it as the devil playing games with me, and as spiritual welfare.

I believe my religious beliefs helped me combat suicidal thoughts. However, had I not received treatment when I did I do not know how long I could have struggled with the disturbing thoughts.

Whenever I was in distress, like from the voices or other hallucinations, I would go on walks, pray, or sing hymns. I prayed a lot, in the mornings to bless my day, before meals, during times of stress, and before bed. I used prayer as a coping strategy before I was diagnosed, and did not know why I feeling confused, alienated, and stressed. Sometimes I would make up songs to sing that gave praises to God and that comforted me and made me feel like I was not alone. However, I must emphasize that I never thought the voices I heard were God, I thought the voices were the people around me.

Still in recovery, I view having this illness as a blessing in disguise. For example, when I first attended college I knew I wanted to have a business I just did not know what type of business. Since my diagnosis I have started a non-profit organization, Embracing My Mind, Inc. To me, the illness has given me a new found purpose.

Now, I do not consider myself religious, instead I see myself as spiritual. However, I still attend church and have faith. Looking back on all that I have experienced in life and with this illness I feel blessed. Blessed to be here, blessed to able to live independently despite my disorder, and content that I am able to facilitate groups and to go back to college. I am thankful to everyone who has contributed to my recovery- medical staff, family, and peers.

Even though my faith has played a major role in my life and throughout the course of my illness I am not bias to say that my specific religion or other religions are solely responsible for one's recovery even though it is a factor. I think religion, whatever that faith is, is a factor in one's recovery because of their outlook on life and on the illness.

To answer the woman's question, in my opinion, it depends on one's support network. Yet, I do believe that people with a mental health diagnosis and who have faith may have a strong support system which helps in their recovery. I think that faith-based groups like other groups offer a lot of support.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Holiday Tips for Families Coping with Schizophrenia

2010-12-18T16:35:00.000-05:00

Joy Paley is a guest blogger for An Apple a Day and a writer on earning your online nursing degree for the Guide to Health Education.

It gets joked about often, but family get-togethers around the holidays can be seriously high-stress affairs. While schizophrenia certainly shouldn’t be the focus of your winter gatherings, it can be another thing to add to the list of holiday worries—the eight hour drive across the state, the cooking of the holiday ham, and wondering how your sister-in-law and her ex are going to behave at the massive Christmas dinner.

This is not to dismiss the seriousness of the disease, but rather to recognize that your loved one coping with schizophrenia is not defined by their disease, and that it shouldn’t be viewed as a scourge upon your family during the holiday season. Instead, family members should focus on taking simple measures to make the holidays a little less stressful for their loved one facing mental illness, as well as everyone involved. Here are a few things you can do to support your family member.

Ask what type of holiday get-together is appealing to them: Seeing certain family members in the chaotic social environment of a huge party can be grating for everyone, and it could be a potential trigger for erratic behavior for your schizophrenic loved one. Ask your loved one what sort of get together or Christmas event is more appealing to them, and use your own judgment to inform this decision as well. While you don’t have to rearrange a family tradition, a potentially less-stressful gathering could be added to the schedule as well.

Talk to any family members who are unsure about how to treat your loved one: After a cousin of mine was diagnosed with schizophrenia, our grandmother would talk to him in an overly loud, simplistic voice, like he was a visiting foreign exchange student. This fact alone kept him from wanting to attend any sort of family gathering, until someone kindly told grandma that he could hear quite well, after all.

Consider speaking to any family members in private who still aren’t sure about how to approach your loved one. You can do this discreetly, and without making a fuss—just focus on telling them to act normally!

Structure gatherings in low-stress settings: This goes along with the first tip, but with the added mention of considering the surroundings and external elements of holiday parties just as much as the people who will be attending. Having a party in a large hall or restaurant can be loud, chaotic, and unnecessarily stressful. Serving alcohol and having your Uncle Bob get trashed and ask to dance with every cousin at the table is embarrassing. Remove external stressors if you can, if you feel like it would help.

Don’t coddle or pity them in public situations: The last thing anyone suffering from a serious mental illness wants is to be treated obviously and embarrassingly different in front of others. While family might have a tendency to innocently ask how they are coping in hushed, puppy-dog voices, this will only serve to single out your loved one and make them feel like the unwanted center of attention.

Avoid focusing on the illness, but keep helpful contacts on hand: The point of the holidays is to enjoy the family and friends who mean the most to you. As I said before, your loved one’s schizophrenia should never unnecessarily become the center of a holiday gathering. Enjoy them, and enjoy each other.

If a situation does become too much for you or your family to handle, however, you want to be able to help your family member in the best way possible. Don’t wait until their behavior is spinning out of control to call their therapist or other physician for help. Keep the important phone numbers nearby, just in case.

Mental Health Labels

2010-12-17T10:04:00.001-05:00

How should I refer to someone living with a psychiatric diagnosis? There are so many terms that are being used to describe someone with a mental health disorder, these terms include:

"Consumer"
"Mentally ill"
"Patient"
"Client"
"Crazy"
"Schizophrenic"

For example, the word "consumer" identifies a person with a mental health concern, and only that group of people. Even though the term does not bother me I could understand how it can frustrate other people. It seems like even the medical field has separated people living with a diagnosis from the bunch.

In my opinion, some of these terms are stigmatizing. Some of the terms seem to single people out and to make having an illness a negative thing. For instance, the words "mentally ill" sounds dreadful to me. To me, it seems like the individual will never get well or that recovery is not an option.

On the other hand, "patient" and "client" seem more acceptable because the terms put mental health in the same boat as other medical conditions. Mental illnesses are another medical condition and should not be subject to the stigma that takes place now.

To me, labeling a person as "crazy" or "schizophrenic" are totally offensive. Crazy has nothing but negative connotations to me. It describes the maniac, the psychopath, and everything that deviates from the standard put forth in society. It also describes someone who lacks understanding of reality.

However, once upon a time a while ago I may have been considered crazy because I was so out of it. While I was in jail for an incident I did that was caused by my untreated psychosis I did not acknowledge the fact that I was in jail. My mind was so distorted that I thought someone was playing a really bad prank on me. I consider that state of mind as crazy because I was unaware of what was reality and what was actually happening to me. Now I do not look at myself as crazy, and I do not like it when people use the term.

The word "schizophrenic" brings back thoughts of misuse of the term from movies. It is a reminder of the common misconceptions. And the term does not view the individual separate from the illness. I am not schizophrenia, I have the disorder.

I am very interested to learn what you think about these labels. So what should I call someone living with a mental illness? How do you refer to yourself or someone with mental health?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Living Independently

2010-12-16T08:06:00.001-05:00

Do you think it is best that someone living with schizophrenia, or any mental illness, live independently or with a caregiver? I ask this question because it became a small debate in a support group.

One group participant said her doctor suggest that she live with someone even though she strives to live independently. She wanted to understand how is it that people living with schizophrenia live on their own. The therapist said that sometimes the doctor will suggest that a client live with someone because they are unstable on medication or are suicidal among other reasons.

In my opinion, I believe it depends on the situation. I would not make a generalization for all people living with schizophrenia or mental illness in regards to living independently because we are all on different levels in our recovery. In addition to that, many of us living with schizophrenia have various treatment plans that may or may not include medication. I am all for whatever works best for the individual whether it be medication and therapy or alternative treatment.

In fact, I live independently, I stay by myself, cook for myself, etc. However, prior to living independently I lived with my mother, I lived in a group home, and I had a roommate. I lived with my mother on and off for different reasons such as going to college or readjusting to Atlanta (I lived in California for a short moment).

I used to be a part of an outpatient treatment program that provided housing in California. They called the group home independent living. In the independent living establishment there was a house manager that cooked for us and sometimes distributed medication to some of us that required support. Most of us living there either had a disability or were a senior.

While I was living on college campus I had a roommate, actually a few of them. Therefore, you can say I've had quite an experience as far as the living arrangement is concerned. And I would highly suggest that other people living with a diagnosis also experiment with various living arrangements to discover the best fit.

So when I felt comfortable living myself you can imagine the excitement, but also the concern my family had for me. I must add that I live close to family and that I gave a key to a relative to feel safer. And I would also suggest to other people living with or without a mental illness to live close to friends and/or family and to give a key to a trusted individual for emergencies.

I think that living independently with a mental illness requires income, attention to the illness, and support. According to a 2008 NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) survey Schizophrenia: Public Attitudes, Personal Needs 17 percent of participants have public housing, while 50 percent depend on family for living arrangements.

However, I can imagine that some people who are not exposed to people managing their illness well do not think that people with mental health can live independently. On the other hand, the NAMI survey claims that 79 percent of the public believe an individual living with schizophrenia can live independent lives. While that statistic sounds great, the survey went on to suggest that only 24 percent of the participants understand schizophrenia.

Again, I believe living independently depends on the individual. What do you think?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

My Frustration: There is more to Schizophrenia than the Voices

2010-12-15T08:14:00.001-05:00

One of the greatest things that frustrate me about living with this illness is the fact that most people do not understand what it is even though they think they know. Sometimes I feel so misunderstood by not only certain individuals but by society. Because when I say the word "Schizophrenia" they automatically think voices and that the individual is crazy or will do something violent.

As you can imagine, it is very offensive when I hear someone refer to another individual living with a mental illness as crazy because I have a diagnosis and I do not view myself as such, nor do I view other people with mental health as crazy. I wish I can get through to other people that think that way and explain that mental health has many faces. Mental illness can affect all sorts of people, no matter what intellectual background, socioeconomic status, age, gender, race, etc. Schizophrenia is much more complicated than hearing the voices.

For me, schizophrenia made me think irrationally, do bizarre things, and to have unnecessary stress. I remember the episodes I had before I was diagnosed with schizophrenia...

At one point I thought my peers and professors were against me. However, that belief carried over to everyone conspiring against me, which was very uncomfortable because it seemed like I can feel people gossiping about me, and that I can read their minds and they could read my mind too.

I would have anxiety attacks around certain people because I felt they were evil. I thought I had the gift of discernment where I can decipher evil spirits and good spirits within people and that I was a prophet. Thinking about it now, it was all very weird, but not to me at the time. I tried to rationalize these beliefs and whenever someone doubted me, like for instance, that the professors were against me I would stop telling them information and this led to isolation.

Eventually I felt like I had a special relationship with God and that only I could understand Him. I believed that the dates on the back of milk cartoons were the real date and whatever people said the date was, was incorrect. I felt like I could not trust anyone and that everyone was out to get me, I was very suspicious.

The voices were a distraction to me. I would be holding a good conversation with someone and then one of the voices would intervene and talk about something that did not make sense or talk about the person to whom I was talking to. And when I would stop to hear what the voices were saying the voices would sometimes stop then start again after I resumed my conversation, it was irritating.

My episode with schizophrenia led me to be arrested and placed into jail and into the State Hospital. My thinking was so off I thought the sitting truck with the car keys in them was a blessing from God and indicator to take the truck. And when I got into the truck some hip-hop song was playing. I did not like the song and still do not to this day because of my interpretation of the song. I thought the song had a deeper meaning as if the devil was trying to get me to commit suicide, but I did not want to die! I tried to ignore the song and concentrate on driving the truck. I eventually crashed the truck head-on into a government building while trying to escape the police. While in custody I thought to myself the police will harm me. I even thought I was Jesus Christ for a moment, that was weird. Later, I discovered that the truck belonged to the military which made my incident a felony.

Schizophrenia is much more than the voices. It encompasses paranoia, delusions, and other things that make an individual feel stress. I am not saying that everyone with the disorder will have a run-in with police, that is not true, it is what happened to me.

I hope that if you hear someone refer to a person with mental health as crazy or something you will investigate and educate them because there are so many misconceptions about schizophrenia and mental illness.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Disclosure Tips for Sticky Situations

2010-12-12T23:05:00.002-05:00

In the previous post I briefly discussed disclosure of my illness in regards to housing, and I want to discuss this in a little more detail because people have a right to privacy about their diagnosis. It is unfortunate that some people are open to discuss their mental health, however, sometimes when they think disclosure could be empowering it does more harm than good, due to the fact that other people simply do not understand mental illness.

Although I am open about my diagnosis and experiences to friends and family, and well just about everyone, I am still selective with who I disclose my illness to. I believe sharing such information should be dealt with delicately whenever someone decides to disclose because stigma is still rampant and at work. By no means am I condoning deception, or for someone to lie about their mental health status, I am simply suggesting that people should be cautious.

Due to my experiences, these are some situations where I feel someone should be hesitant about disclosure: 1) housing, 2) employment and or school, and 3) personal relationships. While seeking a home it is your right to not disclose your illness even if you do have disability benefits. When a landlord asks, 'why do have disability benefits?' you can reply by asking their relevance or simply say 'I prefer not to discuss this.'

I would not tell my employer that I have a disability unless I needed accommodations. Someone could say that their disability requires them to have A, B, and C assistance. Even then, they do not have to specify their mental health status. In school, I have accommodations, however, I do not share my diagnosis with professors. I have them sign my assistance form from the disability office at the beginning of the semester by simply saying I have a disability and need accommodations, 'will you sign here.'

Relationships are special. I usually ask trick questions to get a better understanding of my partner's perspective on mental health. For example,I may ask what do you think about depression and if they reply that depression does not exist, that is my cue to not disclose. Other times I ask them if they ever heard of schizophrenia, most of the time they haven't and I may tell them that I work with people with the disorder and begin to educate them about the illness. Then I decipher their interest in the illness. Eventually, if I feel they can handle it I share with them that I have schizophrenia. I do not put a time limit on when I decide to disclose to my partner. Some people I tell, others I never tell and that is my right.

Just because I decide not to disclose my diagnosis does not mean I am ashamed of having the illness. I accept that I have schizophrenia and will have to work hard to manage it. Sometimes I do not find it appropriate to share like the situations I listed. However, I hope I encouraged you to take precaution in a healthy way.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Addressing Stigma in a Commercial

2010-12-12T06:29:00.001-05:00

What do you think about the commercial?

I was wondering and getting upset at the fact that I have not found any commercials about mental health and then I found this one. I think it is a great commercial because it focuses on the things people living with a diagnosis endure- stigma. Stigma is misunderstanding, lack of information, prejudice, and discrimination like in the workforce or in housing. I like this commercial because it paints a realistic picture of what life can be like for some of us living with a diagnosis.

In fact, just the other day in group a friend of mine was bringing up his concern about job hunting. He said that he called a retail store and asked someone if they were hiring, the employee replied, "you cannot work you get disability." Comments like that are so ignorant, and upsetting. First, of all not everyone living with a mental health diagnosis is on disability. Second, even if someone is on disability they can still work if they choose to.

It reminds me of my own experience with discrimination...I was looking for a room to rent and found one near my school. Everything was going smooth till we discussed my income. After my potential landlord asked me why I get SSI, I told her I have schizophrenia. Then she explained to me that the house was not a good fit for me because my potential roommate may talk too much and may cause unnecessary stress to me. Lesson Learned! Never specify the illness to justify the income. Eventually I found a home and did not disclose reason for my source of income and I didn't have any problems with the landlord and roommates.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

South Korea's "War on Dementia"

2010-12-12T04:52:00.001-05:00

Dementia is memory loss and other interferences to the extent that daily functioning is difficult. It is caused by changes in the brain. Alzheimer's disease is the most common form of dementia though there are several types. Dementia is a major concern in South Korea with it affecting the 65 and older population by 7 percent in 2000, to an estimated 14 percent in 2018, and 20 percent 2026.

However, South Korea's government is taking charge of dementia. Already they have created a long-term health insurance system and a dementia database. They developed the long-term insurance system by increasing the national insurance premium by 6.6 percent, to assist in the creation of centers and training to care for people with dementia. In 2009, about $1 billion government and public health insurance money was allocated toward dementia patients. While the dementia database enables relatives to register dementia patients and to receive iron on identification numbers.

The fight against dementia in South Korea extends beyond the government to the younger generations. Children are getting involved in the "war against dementia". These "dementia supporters" are learning the meaning of dementia, its symptoms, and how to care for someone with dementia.

"The 11- to 13-year-olds, for instance, were in the government’s “Aging-Friendly Comprehensive Experience Hall” outside Seoul. Besides the aging simulation exercise, they viewed a PowerPoint presentation defining dementia and were trained, in the hall’s Dementia Experience Center, to perform hand massage in nursing homes" (Pam Belluck, "Children Ease Alzheimer's in Land of Aging").

South Korea's demonstration should be mirrored for mental health concerns in the United States. More attention should be focused on mental health because it affects someone in our family and perhaps you like me. Wouldn't it be nice to have a program for youth to educate them about the basics of mental health? I believe like in many other demonstrations if we educate our youth we could not only fight stigma but help to overcome mental health.

To read the original article go to New York Times Health's Pam Belluck "Children Ease Alzheimer's in Land of Aging".

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Ice Cream in December

2010-12-09T17:26:00.003-05:00

Today was the last class for NAMI's Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course for the year. Again, Peer-to-Peer is a 10-week educational course. We studied relapse prevention, mental health education, and advance directives.

The majority of the class graduated today- Yay! We started out with about 12 participants and 8 graduated. Everyone was very enthusiastic, they really opened when it was time to share. We celebrated by eating ice cream- butter pecan and vanilla.

I would love to facilitate another class and most likely will in Spring 2011. So keep checking back for another class!

The SSNS 22nd Annual Conference Experience

2010-11-28T15:00:00.010-05:00

The 22nd Annual Conference: Mental Illness- Why Me? Hosted by Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (SSNS) was wonderful! The event took place on Friday, November 26, 2010 at Pier 21. The SSNS Executive Director, Dr. Stephen Ayer, gave me a warm welcome along with the Board of Directors. Dr. Ayer gave me a tour of the city of Halifax, Nova Scotia.

I had an opportunity to dine with the Board of Directors and a couple of other speakers for the conference. The Board gave me a beautiful gift of a photograph taken by J. Ross. In addition to that, I went to dinner with another presenter from the conference, Ms. Laura Burke and her family and friends.

A Photograph by J. Ross

Speaking at the conference enabled me to share my testimony of living with schizophrenia, and to give suggestions to other people directly affected by the illness. I titled my speech, A Distorted Perception to Reality: My Insight Into Recovery, because for me, schizophrenia forced me to think irrationally. However, the illness is manageable, and I am overcoming schizophrenia with the support of medication, support from others, and group therapy.

After delivering my speech, several people asked questions about my experience. I had a moment with some of the guests to elaborate on my experience and to exchange stories. Many of the participants thought my talk was inspirational, which I am glad because having an illness like schizophrenia can be tough, however, it is manageable.

Ashley Smith, Founder and Executive Director of Embracing My Mind, Inc.

Schizophrenia Patients and Physical Intimacy: The Mental, Emotional and Physical Benefits

2010-11-18T17:03:00.001-05:00

The following article was written by Kristin Davis.

As our culture learns more about schizophrenia, the emphasis while addressing patients no longer resides with the disease, but instead with the individual and their needs. With many groups and organizations now devoted to recognizing the individual requirements of these sufferers, treatment now places an emphasis on their complete wellbeing. Although traditional schizophrenia treatments did little to address social and emotional aspects of patients, the combination of new medications, awareness of the disease and support groups have all spurred on these new treatment goals. While antipsychotic medications often led to many severe side effects, newer atypical antipsychotic drugs show fewer negative consequences, including reduced sexual dysfunction.

Because modern medicine identifies numerous benefits, both mental and physical, of healthy sexual activity, schizophrenic patients should consider developing bonds that allow them to have a physical relationship. Isolation and depression are among the most common ailments of individuals coping with this disease, which are greatly improved through healthy sexual contact. In the past, doctors encouraged schizophrenic patients not to engage in sexual activity. These medical professionals might have provided this discriminatory medical advice out of the desire to prevent the spread of this genetically-linked disease or a general disdain for these patients. Nevertheless, whatever the motivations of the medical community, the general lack of concern regarding schizophrenia patients took a heavy toll on those who might otherwise have benefited from the normalcy and companionship of an intimate relationship.

About 40% of patients with schizophrenia experience a major depressive episode. Furthermore, a large number of those patients attempt suicide while in the midst of this severe depression. Because healthy sex has a strong correlation to heightened levels of contentment, these patients, in particular, can benefit from the emotional release physical intimacy provides. Biological research also links sexual intercourse to stress relief and lower levels of blood pressure. Coping with a condition like schizophrenia unquestionably leads to elevated levels of stress in sufferers, which makes this ancillary benefit valuable. Emotional difficulty and agitation are two common symptoms of the disease that healthy sex could prevent.

Furthermore, sex naturally boosts self esteem, which remains a further concern for patients. Schizophrenia impacts virtually all facets of an individual’s life, which can seriously damage one’s sense of self-worth. Fortunately, regular sexual activity can help a patient recover lost self esteem or even continue to improve it. Because significant social dysfunction also commonly accompanies schizophrenic patients, intimacy remains a huge barrier to individuals suffering from this disease. However, healthy sex can improve and promote intimacy in a couple, even as this disease naturally inhibits that connection.

Physical benefits of sexual health include the maintenance of healthy weight through caloric burn. Because schizophrenic patients can experience severe weight gain as a result of their medications, this physical benefit remains especially important. In addition, sex can boost immunity, cardiovascular health and reduce pain. With the numerous health benefits that directly address common concerns of schizophrenia patients, a healthy level of sexual activity remains the safest, most convenient way for patients to improve their quality of life.

Nevertheless, schizophrenia patients should be careful to ensure they engage in responsible sex. Because of a history of social isolation, many individuals might not possess familiarity with physical intimacy or safe sex. Recent trends show a rise in sexually transmitted disease, especially among young adults, which makes proper contraceptive use especially important. Individuals need to learn about which contraceptives most effectively prevent pregnancy and disease before beginning these physical relationships.

Oral contraceptives, an outwardly suitable option, present a particularly great risk to female patients because they might hastily choose this option without proper research due to a comfort with oral medications. In addition, free family planning clinics regularly provide these drugs to individuals seeking contraception. However, these drugs have also caused severe health consequence, including an elevated risk of heart attack, stroke and pulmonary embolism. Some oral contraceptives have shown particularly damaging results, leaving numerous patients with serious physical harm. One lawsuit involves Ann Marie Eakins, who is suing the manufacturer for blood clots she developed in her lungs. Promoted as total quality-of-life aids, drug advertisements also risk leaving schizophrenia patients with misconceptions, including the mistaken belief that these pills protect against sexually transmitted disease.

With the acknowledged dangers that accompany sexual activity, it remains important for patients to gather all the required information on how to safely begin a physical relationship before taking this step. However, with the numerous benefits associated with healthy sexuality, it remains a great option for schizophrenia patients seeking improvement in their quality of life. While many of the social stigmas regarding schizophrenia have been removed from society, the widespread belief that a physical intimacy cannot exist for a sufferer of schizophrenia remains one of the final hurdles to the full social acceptance of these individuals.

About me: My name is Kristin Davis. I am an aspiring free lance writer with a passion for women's health. My email is daviskristin795@gmail.com.

IOOV Presentation on Monday, November 15th

2010-11-18T07:57:00.004-05:00

On Monday, November 15, 2010 I facilitated a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) program called In Our Own Voice (IOOV). The program's objective is to fight stigma by sharing one's story of recovery. The presentation involves a 15 minute DVD of several testimonies that is divided by chapters that emphasize the struggle, or worse part of the illness, acceptance and coping skills, as well as a section on hopes and dreams.

The audience was very receptive to my experience of living with schizophrenia. The audience were mostly police officers, however, the program can be for any sort of audience including consumers, someone living with a mental health diagnosis, students, etc. These police officers were in a training program called Crisis Intervention Team (CIT). They asked so many questions that I had to limit them- it felt really good to have their full attention and to bring about awareness.

I am excited about the program and I look forward to facilitating the next presentation. Many times I announce these presentations on Facebook, so check out our Facebook page.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (SSNS) in Canada.

Tips for the Family Member

2010-11-14T17:22:00.002-05:00

Recently, I wrote about quick tips for the newly diagnosed, however, what about the family members?

If you are a relative of someone living with a diagnosis it is essential to educate yourself about the mental illness. Here are some credible websites that I personally use and recommend to others:

There are FREE support groups for family members. NAMI for example, provides these programs. Participating in a support group has many benefits. Here is an example of benefits:

Obtain personal referrals to resources such as treatment facilities and housing options
Learn from other people's experience how to cope
Discuss concerns with someone who has been there and who understands

If your loved one is in dire need of supervision and support do not feel bad if you need to get assistance from a hospital, independent living establishment, etc. These facilities are equipped to help your loved one stay well. It may be a good idea to get a personal referral from a support group member as to what hospital to get support.

Although the hospital stay can be hard on you and your family member living with a diagnosis there are benefits to the hospital stay. For instance, the hospital staff stabilizes your loved one through medication and/or therapy. They offer education to your loved about the mental illness. The environment is monitored if your loved one is a danger themselves.

Lastly, coming from an individual who was court-ordered to take medication, if your loved one is severely affected by their mental illness and is not functioning or is a danger to themselves or others, mandated medication compliance may need to be researched.

Get to know health care professionals to assist you in a situation where this is needed. Court-ordered medication compliance is NOT for everyone. I'll use myself as an example. When my illness got really bad, I became catatonic. I was not moving my body limbs for periods at a time. I had stopped eating, drinking, showering and speaking.

In fact, my mother thought she was going to have to take full guardianship of me because my illness was so devastating. Now, I am thankful that my family supported court-ordered medication compliance because it saved my life.

However, with BOTH medication and therapy I slowly but surely got well again to the extent that I voluntarily took my medicine as recommended by the doctor regularly and participated in support groups. DO NOT underestimate the importance of a combination of therapy, medication, and support groups- they work, for me at least.

In short, I suggest that family members get a better understanding of the illness. join a support group, do not hesitate to get support from other facilities like the hospital, and if in a severe situation research and follow through on court-ordered medication compliance. Lastly, continue to support your loved one by being there for them in whatever capacity you can take on.

These tips are only suggestions and are not to replace professional advice.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Benefits of Writing

2010-11-08T11:58:00.001-05:00

In psychology class, we briefly discussed the benefits of writing. In fact, the instructor certified these findings by the studies of a man by the name of Mr. James W. Pennebaker. Mr. Pennebaker suggests that writing about traumatic events has benefits, therefore, I encourage you to 1) write, and 2) to do research on this man and his studies as it relates to writing and possibly helping those with a mental health diagnosis.

One of my coping skills involves keeping a journal. I have written about this as a coping skill in the past that works for me and it may work for you too. Although I do not journal everyday, whenever I do journal it makes me feel good because I can reflect on what I've written in the past or at the moment. Usually, I write about everyday events and my thoughts and feelings about them. I try to stay as candid and frank as possible to answer my own doubts or to make decisions.

In fact, I started this blog initially as a diary to reflect on knowledge I acquired about schizophrenia, and to manage my symptoms and moods to later discuss with my doctor. However, this blog quickly became a resource for others living with the illness as well as family members and interested parties. And I am a big advocate on reducing stigma around mental health so I welcomed questions and suggestions from readers.

Writing about my experiences with schizophrenia 1) Enables me to remember how the illness impacted my life, 2) It is a consistent reminder of why I take my medication regularly, 3) It motivates me to continue to work on my recovery, which is an ongoing process for me.

I encourage you to write about your life and everyday stresses to help you cope. And this does not have to be a chore, write whenever you have the time or need to vent, find an answer, or just to keep a record of your life. I still journal, not everyday, but it helps me to stay on track with my recovery.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Quick Tips for the Newly Diagnosed

2010-10-31T08:57:00.001-04:00

Recently, I spoke to someone who was newly diagnosed with schizophrenia. Although they did not know what to ask me, I suggested some things for them to do...

1) Find a healthcare professional in the mental health field.

It is best to find a psychiatrist, a doctor who prescribes medication, and also a therapist. A therapist is beneficial because they provide resources and support in addition to therapy. If someone does not have health insurance look into the county mental health centers for services or referrals.

2) Apply for disability benefits.

Because mental health can be so severe to the extent that a person cannot work I strongly suggest that person apply for disability benefits. However, many times people are denied benefits the first time around therefore a person should get support from an agency that provides that service. Lastly, the benefits may take a few months so do not expect a fast turn around.

3) Find a support group.

Many people do not understand mental illness. Participating in a support allows a person to connect with other people who have the same concerns- mental health. Support groups are usually free and are led by someone who is either living with a mental illness, is a family member, or a healthcare professional. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) is a great place to start, they provide free support groups throughout the United States.

4) Join an outpatient treatment center or clubhouse.

An outpatient treatment center or clubhouse provides many classes to help someone learn about their mental illness and other life skills. They also help people find resources they need such as healthcare, housing, employment or volunteer opportunities, and education.

All of these tips I have personally practiced and it has tremendously helped me to get to where I am today- high functioning, living independently and back in college. These tips can also help you or your loved one get on track to recovery. The benefits of these practices does not happen overnight, it takes time and even becomes a lifestyle to stay well, at least for me. I hope that you or your loved one will utilize these tips.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Book Review: Crazy Like Us

2010-10-21T14:03:00.004-04:00

The following book review was submitted by Eric Fergerson.

Crazy Like Us (The Globalization of the American Psyche) is insightful and thought-provoking. It looks at the influence of Western medicine on the diagnosis and treatment of mental illness around the world. The author Ethan Watters examines this process by chronicling the rise of Anorexia in Hong Kong, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder in Sri Lanka, Schizophrenia in Zanzibar and Depression in Japan.

Mr. Watters travels the globe to meet with researchers involved in studying these illnesses in their indigenous cultures. He looks at the socio-cultural, historical, etiological and epidemiology of these illnesses. He uses first person accounts along with personal and doctor interviews to develop his thesis. He does not conclude that Western medicine is simply either inferior or superior to indigenous belief systems in regards to ways of healing and recovery. In fact, he states "I have tried to avoid making the cliched argument that other, more traditional cultures necessarily have it right when it comes to treating mental illness. All cultures struggle with these intractable diseases with varying degrees of compassion and cruelty, equanimity and fear. My point is not that they necessarily have it right - only that they have it different."

On a personal level I truly enjoyed this book. As a student of psychology viewing Mr. Watter's theory from multiple perspectives I was thoroughly engaged and provoked. This book is a must read for anyone interested in a cross-cultural understanding and appreciation of the diversity of ideas surrounding the treatment and diagnosis of mental illness around the world.

EMM Website Update

2010-10-20T10:25:00.004-04:00

The Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM) website was updated, please visit the site to see changes, click here.

The mission of EMM is to provide peer support, advocacy, and education to low income and homeless individuals living with serious mental health concerns.

The group provides recovery support groups and other programs to consumers and people affected by mental health. All programs are offered in the Atlanta metropolitan area FREE of charge. However, most programs are closed meetings, not open to the public.

If you would like your organization to provide EMM programs please contact Ashley Smith, Executive Director, by email: info@embracingmymind.org or phone: 1-888-839-3191.

Thank you for your observation. To learn more about schizophrenia visit EMM, NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (SSNS, Canada).

5 Tips for Finding the Right Therapist for You

2010-10-19T15:38:00.004-04:00

The following entry was submitted by Kitty Holman:

For those who suffer from mental illnesses like schizophrenia, medication can be effective in alleviating the most serious symptoms, but lifestyle management and substantive therapy go further in treating the illness long-term. Since therapy can play a key role in achieving and maintaining stability, it's very important that you be selective in choosing a therapist. While every licensed therapist does have professional credentials, the styles and personalities of each different therapist are more suited to some patients than others. Here are a few tips for finding a therapist that meets your specific needs.

1. Get recommendations from friends or family.

To get a better idea of what a therapist will be like before you meet him or her, ask your friends, acquaintances, or family for recommendations. Word-of-mouth is often the best way to begin an initial search for a therapist because you'll know exactly how the potential therapist works based on personal insight.

2. Don't be afraid to shop around.

Many people will simply go with the first therapist they talk to. However, you should see therapy as an investment in your personal well-being. If you don't "click" with the first therapist you talk to, see a few others before deciding on any one.

3. Find a therapist with whom you feel comfortable.

Since the things you talk about during successful therapy sessions are of a highly personal nature, you'll need to be very comfortable sharing details about your life that you wouldn't normally divulge to other people. If you feel hesitant to tell your therapist about any sort of challenge you're facing in your life, then this is a sign that you might need to look for someone else.

4. The office environment is also important.

While a therapist you are considering may be a perfect fit in all respects, the environment in which the sessions will be conducted is important, too. Take note about how you feel when you enter the therapist's office. Is it an environment in which you feel safe and secure enough to talk freely?

5. Ask the therapist what her specialties are.

Therapy has developed hundreds of different approaches over the years--from psychoanalysis to cognitive therapy to everything in between. Do some research and find out what method most appeals to you. Also ask the therapist what she hopes to accomplish with her patients, what she sees is the role of therapy in general, and anything else that you can think of that you wish to know before deciding.

These are just a few considerations to take into account while looking for the perfect therapist. Above all, remember that it isn't a decision that you should make lightly. Therapy can be as effective as you want it to be, but finding someone with whom you can establish a long-term relationship is most important. Also, if after a few sessions you feel that the therapy is largely ineffective, then don't hesitate in finding someone new. You'd be surprised by how life-changing therapy can be, provided you take the right steps in the decision-making process.

By-line:
This guest post is contributed by Kitty Holman, who writes on the topics of nursing schools. She welcomes your comments at her email Id: kitty.holman20@gmail.com.

Denial in the Family Member--A Different Perspective

2010-10-17T07:38:00.002-04:00

Since my diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia in 2007 I have participated in several support groups and trainings to be a facilitator. Therefore, I have heard many of my peers discuss different concerns from side effects of medications to lack of support, and many other important matters.

Even though what I am about to discuss may NOT apply to you as a family member or consumer (a person living with mental health concerns) it occurs quite frequently, and thus is the reason to bring it to one's attention...I am talking about denial. Denial in the sense that it is refusal to believe or accept a person's diagnosis of mental illness. Denial comes in many different forms for both the consumer and the family member.

In fact, denial is a manifestation of stigma. In short, stigma is criticism of a person on the grounds of their affiliation with a group (that being mental illness) based on lack of understanding or stereotypes. For example, common misconceptions about schizophrenia is that all people who have the disorder have split personality and/or are violent, this is NOT true. Finally, I am going to elaborate on denial of the family member(s) for now based either actual experience or testimonies I have heard from peers.

Unfortunately, a common myth is that mental illness is caused by bad parenting. In my experience, people still believe this to be true. After my nervous breakdown which led doctors to diagnosis me with schizophrenia my family members were in disbelief at the occurrence of mental illness in their Ashley. And some of them believed there was someone to blame for my mental health condition and that person was my mother. This caused a huge strain on family relationships for a while and slowed the process of understanding of what having schizophrenia means for the consumer and family member.

A common, yet NOT universal form of denial is avoiding the situation all together. Some members of the family choose not to participate in the recovery stage because of the stigma associated with mental illness. They are more concerned with the way they will appear to other people than their relative's wellness. Therefore, they opt out to discuss anything related to mental illness, and in some cases do not even want to be seen in public with the consumer.

In addition to that, some people hinder their relative's social life or life in general because they believe their mental illness will not allow them to participate in regular daily activities despite the fact that they are coping with the illness with the necessary treatments. Accordingly, some family members make up reasons why their relative living with a mental health concern cannot go to some places or do some things. For example, some relatives believe it is inappropriate for the consumer to attend college, because they assume it is too difficult. Nowadays, colleges make accommodations for people with disabilities. In fact, I am in college studyig psychology to continue to be an advocate for mental health. Going to college or having a career is possible living with mental illness with treatment and support.

Ultimately, the above examples of varying forms of denial is unacceptable and ludicrous. If I described you, change is possible. Here are some ways a family member can be supportive of the consumer:

Research the mental illness

Talk to them

Show interest in their lives

Spend time with them

Be understanding of their symptoms and struggles

If you would like to perform research and to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), the Naional Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Schizophrenia Basics

2010-10-16T11:48:00.003-04:00

Every so often I like to reiterate my understanding of schizophrenia to ensure that my readers understand the basic information about the illness...

In my experience and personal research on schizophrenia it is a complex brain disorder that affects thoughts, judgment, and sense of reality. Now, I will share with you some of my experiences with the illness.

Before I had knowledge of my mental health condition I experienced diverse symptoms of schizophrenia including the following: A belief that I had special abilities to read other people's minds, extreme paranoia in that I believed that other people were trying to harm me by poisoning my food (even family members!). The fear of others trying to kill me, by serving tainted food, encouraged me not to eat- anything. This led me to lose a lot of weight, at one point I weighed under hundred pounds, which is really bad for my height of 5"5- if you can imagine.

In addition to that, I heard multiple mean-spirited, characterized voices that I rationalized by believing they were either coming from my cell phone or from other people around me. I remember one voice said: "You are a dishonor to your family!" This made me feel very sad and confused because I did not understand why the people (voices in my mind) said that.

I saw strange-looking people. One particular recurring hallucination was an elderly man on an antique bicycle following me. This man followed me on several different occasions. On top of that, I thought that people were spying on me. And because my thoughts were so distorted I remember thinking to myself if I can smoke a cigarette- which I hate- I could confuse them into thinking I am someone else and they may leave me alone. But that's not where it stops, I removed my eye glasses (which I need to see) to further disguise myself. Finally, I ditched my cell phone and Bible which I carried with me everywhere. I left the cell phone at a restaurant because I thought it was bugged and had a tracking device in it. I thought the Bible would give me away so I got rid of my most prized piece and left that too. I could go on and on about my symptoms, but I won't because I don't want to lose you to the fact that it can be so discouraging.

Therefore, I will say that my treatment (medication, therapy, and support) does wonders, which is a blessing from God. Despite my mental illness, I am able to perform like everyone else because of my treatment. After three of my diagnosis, I am now attending college again, facilitating support groups, and living on my own.

While I accept the fact that I need medication to cope, because my illness was so severe, I do not agree that everybody who has mental illness needs to take medication. I feel this way because there are various levels of severity in mental illness depending on the individual. And nowadays, there are alternative forms of treatment.

Did this entry give you insight into schizophrenia? Did you learn something new?

Thank you for you for studying this topic, which is so important to me. If you want to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Promoting Wellness with Support Groups

2010-10-14T17:01:00.003-04:00

In group today, I reiterated my background in receiving mental health treatment at the center where I receive care...I have come a long way! I re-introduced myself because we had a guest, an intern studying social work.

I remember just two years ago I was struggling with isolation and not interacting with many people outside of my family. In general, isolation is a concern for people living with a mental illness because it is a common symptom. For me, I was comfortable being alone in the confinement of my home with the Internet and my online scrabble games and music. However, I desired more social activity besides family so I forced myself to get out of my comfort zone and to participate in all of the group sessions the center had to offer.

And now I am functioning at an even higher level than before, and I am thankful for the treatment and therapy I have received from the mental health care staff, family and peer support. I strongly recommend group therapy to others who want to enhance their social skills and decrease risk of isolation; and also, to improve their level of functioning.

In my experience, the support groups are an outlet to keep it real and to get various perspectives on everyday struggles and accomplishments. The support groups that I participate in are like a family to me now- we share our concerns and joys in a respectful manner.

If you want to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Medication Adherence and Violence Management in Schizophrenic Patients

2010-10-04T09:01:00.003-04:00

The following article was written by Alexis Bonari:

Medication Adherence and Violence Management in Schizophrenic Patients

Violence is not a widespread problem among people who have been diagnosed with schizophrenia, but when it does accompany schizophrenia (about 16% of the time), it can become a significant issue. When violent schizophrenic cases arise, it can be difficult for doctors to prescribe a specific course of action because little is known about the efficacy of violence management medication in schizophrenic patients. To address this problem, Dr. Jeffrey Swanson and a team of researchers studied the effects of four different antipsychotic medications on a cohort of schizophrenic patients over a period of six months. In their research, they hoped to find out how medicated patients’ violent tendencies changed as compared to patients who refused to adhere to doctors’ medication recommendations.

Reducing Schizophrenic Violence: Predictors and Solutions

Swanson and his team found that there were several consistent factors that could predict violence in patients with schizophrenia. This information could be valuable to doctors who are trying to decide whether or not to prescribe antipsychotic medication, as not all schizophrenic patients require it. The violence predictors identified by these researchers are as follows: economic deprivation, living with family or others rather than living alone, history of childhood conduct problems, substance abuse, and history of violent victimization. Specifically, patients who had experienced childhood conduct problems were statistically unresponsive to antipsychotic medication, while others were successfully treated. A strong correlation was established between violence reduction and medication regimen adherence by patients without childhood conduct problems. Patients with negative results in psychosis tests also experienced greater success with violence management medication.

Relative Success of Medications in Violence Management

In terms of the medication itself, the four different varieties performed very similarly. However, the first-generation medication was slightly more effective than the second-generation drugs in treating the cohort of patients who adhered to their recommended medication schedule. This finding is in direct contrast to the assumption that new medications are more effective than older ones and may help doctors to make more informed choices.

The researchers found that patients who took their medication as recommended experienced a 43% decline in violent tendencies. However, the cohort of patients who did not complete the six-month medication regimen experienced only a 27% reduction in violence. The results of the study showed that, in addition to antipsychotic medication, treatment adherence and social functioning are important components of successful violence management. In order to address all angles of schizophrenic violence, interventions must be made in therapy and social support as well as in antipsychotic medication. Although medication cannot act on its own, its role has been proven valuable in schizophrenic violence management.

Bio: Alexis Bonari is a freelance writer and blog junkie. She often can be found blogging about education and scholarships for college. In her spare time, she enjoys square-foot gardening, swimming, and avoiding her laptop.

Swanson, Jeffrey W., PhD et al. “Comparison of antipsychotic medication effects on reducing violence in people with schizophrenia.” The British Journal of Psychiatry 193 (2008): 37-43.

Photo: Public Domain
URL: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3182/2662351949_be7f4545c7.jpg

Support in College and Current NAMI Projects

2010-10-01T17:10:00.001-04:00

Recently, I brought my health concern to the Office of Disability at my college and it worked in my favor- I received the support that I needed and I did not feel belittled, misunderstood, or stupid. There were counselors that took my health concerns seriously and wanted to help me succeed. They offered additional tutoring, classroom accommodations, and a separate testing area, which I did utilize.

I am not sure if all colleges have a disability office, however, it is worth looking into for additional support. For those that are interested, there is usually a process such as getting a letter from your doctor. The letter has a lot information about the individual with the mental illness, including diagnosis, special accommodations, etc. Therefore, if you would like to receive more support from your college look into the guidelines of the disability center.

Finally, college is going okay for me. I am still adjusting to school and participating in groups. In fact, I performed my first NAMI In Our Own Voice presentation and I am leading a new NAMI Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course. In short, the In Our Own Voice presentation is about 1-1.5 hours on a person's experience with mental illness. I did this presentation for a Crisis Intervention Team training for police officers. I had a wonderful experience and they really enjoyed learning about my story.

While, Peer-to-Peer is a 10-session class about mental health information, coping skills, and relapse prevention planning. Orientation was yesterday and everybody seems very enthusiastic about the class, which makes me feel even more excited about mentoring the group.

If you would like to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Getting Help to get to the Next Step

2010-08-22T11:54:00.006-04:00

Some people would come to me and ask for advice on how to get through a phase of schizophrenia, like overcoming a lot of sleep and not interacting with people. However, sleeping a lot could be a side effect of medication or not having anything to do, like in my experiences. I do not give medical advice when these situations arise, because I am not a Doctor, however, I do mention experiences and things I did that worked for me. Furthermore, it makes me recall my own experiences and bizarre thinking processes I used to believe.

For instance, after I moved back home with my mother I became very comfortable not doing anything but either sleeping or staying on the computer all day. I did not socialize with other people outside of the family which eventually bothered me. Therefore, I forced myself to get out of my comfort zone and to interact with other people by attending group therapy. Over time my decision to go to group turned out to solve my problem. Accordingly I got more than I intended. I gained more education on my mental illness by participating in group, socialized with group participants, and I learned to trust my therapist even more. Now, I am a social butterfly. I talk a lot everyday and network with others in the mental health field.

Recently, I remembered I used to have a problem showering. This can be a problem for many people living with schizophrenia at one point in their illness, but not all people with schizophrenia have this problem. It is not that I did not want to take a shower, I did but my thinking processes would not allow me to carry out the task. Therefore, I chose not to shower because I thought the soap would burn my skin. Having an illness like schizophrenia distorts one's thinking processes. When in reality the soap did NOT burn my skin, but was, in fact, cheap, and made my skin very dry.

Moreover, I thought I had a connection with God and that He made me immune to NOT stink and to NOT get sick by not showering. However, I later realized that was not the case. At times, nurses would ask me to shower because "it was starting to become offensive." And I would be thankful that they asked me to shower because I did not have the initiative to perform that task.

Another problem I had was not talking much. I did not have anything to say. During group sessions in the institution I would just sit there during group therapy and wait till the session was over. I understood that I had to attend group therapy, however, I did not have to participate. I was very patient as well. Although in the beginning I did not want to participate in group therapy in the long run it was very beneficial. Therefore in my experience going to group therapy has many benefits and having someone to help me get through the things I found slightly difficult helped me a lot.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Alternative Treatments for Mental Illness

2010-08-20T10:14:00.002-04:00

The following article was written by a guest writer, Maryanne Osberg.

No matter how much we learn about mental illness, its causes and its uncontrollable nature, it is still a stigma for the sufferer. They’re not just wracked by mental demons, they also have to deal with being ostracized by society and sometimes even their family members. Some forms of mental illness are caused by old age – Alzheimer’s and dementia are now becoming even more common nowadays; others are caused by trauma – the sudden loss of loved ones through accidents or breakdown of relationships leads people to act irrationally and become mentally affected; and yet others come about because of neglect and loneliness – people who live alone with hardly any contact with fellow human beings tend to become mentally unstable and forget their people skills over a period of time.

Whatever the reason for mental illness, it is imperative that the affected person be treated immediately. Drugs and therapy are two standard and well-accepted forms of treatment for mental illnesses ranging from dementia to depression. However, there are other alternative treatment forms that are competent and free of the side effects that are associated with drugs, and if the patient is open to trying them, they can be used effectively to help improve the quality of their life:

• Emotional conditioning: The condition of people with depression and similar forms of mental illness improves when you’re able to infuse in them some self-confidence and the ability to believe in themselves. This mental conditioning can be done by a qualified therapist, or better still, by the loving care and support offered by friends, family members and co-workers. The patient needs to be encouraged to take up activities that boost their feeling of well-being and their happiness quotient – if they are creative, they could paint or write; if they like physical activity, exercise and chores like gardening help relax both body and mind; and if work helps, they can be encouraged to keep busy at the office. The key to emotional conditioning is that it has to be tailored according to each individual, based on what they like and are comfortable doing.

• Yoga, acupuncture and other complementary methods: Some people find that yoga, Ayurveda, acupuncture and other traditional practices of medicine help people with mental illness when used in conjunction with their regular medication. They’re able to relax and avoid the thoughts that drive them to depression or manic behavior. They gain more control over their bodies and their minds. And they feel at peace with themselves and the world at large.

• Social activities: Most forms of mental illness are caused by loneliness or a sense of being unloved and unwanted. An active social life helps prevent the onset of such kinds of depression and also helps alleviate mental illness when it starts to manifest itself. When you stay active and meet and interact with people on a professional and personal basis, you feel good about yourself and your brain gets a positive boost of uplifting energy.

Besides this, the right diet and nutrition and regular exercise can help bring about some routine to a mentally ill person’s life and hasten their journey back to normalcy.

By-line:
This guest post is contributed by Maryanne Osberg, who writes on the topic of RN to MSN Online. She can be reached at mary.anne579(AT)gmail(DOT)com.

Advocacy -- NAMI: IOOV Training

2010-08-16T12:25:00.005-04:00

The NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) In Our Own Voice: Living with a Mental Illness (IOOV) training was phenomenal! Many of my peers left the training with a feeling of pride in having a mental illness. Way to go! Correction: the presentation is 90 minutes. It includes five segments: Dark Days, Acceptance, Treatment, Coping Skills, and Successes,Hopes, and Dreams. We stop the video to elaborate on each section in our personal experiences. There are two presenters and the presentation can be fulfilled in a variety of settings.

There is one element of the presentation I would like to discuss in more detail, Successes, Hopes, and Dreams. In the training I told the audience about this blog, which is a success because of you- Thank You! In addition to the blog, I shared information about my non-profit organization, Embracing My Mind, Inc. and how I would like to operate a wellness center with various groups to help people on their journey to recovery. My volunteer work with NAMI, and my hope of graduating from college. However, I forgot to mention the fact that I would like to own my own home and to write a book about my experiences with schizophrenia- good and bad and outcome- today leading groups to educate others about mental health and to reduce stigma.

The main reason why I am participating in and facilitating many mental health groups is because I want to contribute to the elimination of stigma, in general and next self-stigma. Stigma is negative perceptions someone has toward a group of people as a result of lack of education, fear, and exposure to. Self-stigma is when someone internalizes another's negative perceptions and limits their hopes, aspirations, and way of thinking that may eventually have a toil on their self-esteem. I believe education and exposure to mental illness will change perspectives and accordingly reduce stigma. And being an IOOV presenter is another way for me to work on dismantling stigma and self-stigma. If you are interested in seeing the In Our Own Voice presentation and you are in the Atlanta area, please contact me by email: info@embracingmymind.org.

Recently, I made a huge change and took a great risk and sacrifice. I changed my major from business and marketing to psychology to benefit my goals of having a wellness center through Embracing My Mind, Inc. This was a great risk because by changing my major I pushed back my graduation date tremendously. I had two years of credits/classes in business and marketing. Now, I do not know how many classes will count toward my new major, but I am satisfied with my decision and I think it was one of the most fulfilling decisions I have made.

However, with so many things I have planned this fall I will also focus on limiting my stress. I plan on taking two classes in addition to leading support groups. To help cope with stress I enjoy writing- it is soothing, talking to family and listening to music. I know from research talking to my health care provider that I must manage my stress because if I do not the symptoms can return even though I am on medication. The medication helps me function but stress can sabotage its impact. Because I am anticipating some stress related to school I will write more often and let my doctor know if I experience any symptoms- voices, paranoia, delusions, etc.

In short, schizophrenia is a complicated illness that affects a person's social, mental, and emotional. For me, as I may have mentioned many times before, my illness took a toil on me to the extent that I was not doing anything- eating, drinking, showering, talking, or even moving. The voices and paranoia took life away from me, however, medication, therapy and support gave me my life back!

If you would like to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

NAMI Training- IOOV

2010-08-13T14:46:00.002-04:00

This weekend I will participate in another NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) training for a program called, In Our Own Voice. I am very excited about the training and to have an opportunity to execute the program. The program shows a video of people sharing their personal experiences with mental illness and then the presenter stops the video to share their story. All-in-all the program is about 45 minutes to an hour. I'll tell more after the training.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

SSNS 22nd Annual Conference

2010-07-27T10:06:00.006-04:00

Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (SSNS) will hold its 22nd Annual Conference in Halifax, Canada on Friday, November 26, 2010 at Pier 21. The theme of the 2010 conference is Mental Illness: Why Me? And SSNS has invited me to speak at the conference! The invitation is an honor, I am very excited about the opportunity to speak.

More information will be posted on the site as planning develops. For sponsorship information contact Stephen Ayer at (902) 465-2601 or send an email to ssns@ns.sympatico.ca.

For more information on schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Intro. to the NAMI Walk

2010-07-22T17:52:00.002-04:00

Today I went to a NAMI Georgia luncheon at Peachford Hospital about the NAMI Walk. I am so excited about the Walk which will take place September 18th. In fact, I plan on being a team leader, so wish me luck as continue to share my story and ask for financial support.

When the speaker asked us why we are walking I said several things: to fight stigma, for myself, support groups, and community. Fighting stigma is the ultimate goal, even though I am open about my diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia a lot of people are still unaware of what mental illness is or believe common misconceptions about mental illness. The most common misconceptions about schizophrenia is believing that all people who have the illness have split personality or are violent, which is NOT true. I want to continue to help overcome stigma by doing this NAMI Walk.

I have never done a NAMI Walk, but I am ready for the challenge so bring it on! I will give you more info. as the Walk approaches, until then get involved, listen, support, give, share your story, and fight stigma to change minds and hearts!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Speaking Up

2010-07-20T10:23:00.003-04:00

After reading a few books by the same author I was offended by the way mental health concerns were mentioned in a couple of their books so I emailed the author about my concerns. I am still a fan of the author I just wanted to voice my concerns to let them know it was offensive and hopefully they will be more sensitive about mental health. Below is the edited version of the letter I wrote, omiting the author's name and book titles...

Hello Ms. [Blank]:

I became an immediate fan of yours since I read [blank]. While I am a fan, I do have some concerns about the stigma you may be contributing to as it relates to mental health. For example, in [blank], you mentioned an ex-boyfriend who has schizophrenia and how he may desire to commit violence by burning down someone's house with them in it. I too have schizophrenia. I am not violent and I am an upstanding citizen through volunteer work.

In another work of yours, [blank], the main character wondered why her father could have had a mental illness. Why can't the individual doing the wrong deed just be a bad person, why do they have to have a mental illness?

In short, I love your work but some things are offensive as it relates to mental health and I hope in future writings you will be more sensitive.

Thank you for your consideration and keep writing!

Ashley Smith
Fan and concerned mental health advocate

[Response from the author]

Hi Ashley,

Thank you so much for reading my work and for taking time to email me. In terms of my reference to schizophrenia with the character, Aaron, he is not representative of all people who have this illness and I apologize if you felt that way while reading about him. My work is fiction, so there may be times when I will create characters based on what I amy have heard or seen but my characters never represent an entire group of people. For example, when I write about [the main character's name], I am not saying that all pastors are consumed with money, power...Actually, when it comes to someone burning a house, the person doing it could have a mental illness or they may not have a mental illness, so again, this was just the illness I chose because of examples I know of.

In [blank, title of the book], the reason I chose to write that her stepfather must have had a mental illness was because there have been many times when pedophiles have admitted that they simply cannot help themselves and even hate themselves for doing what they have done to a child. I've heard some say (not all) say themselves that they were sick. This isn't always the case, but this is what I chose to write in my particular novel, and it is also what I believe was the case with the man who molested me when I was a child. There are also times in my stories when people tend to do bad things simpoly because they are just bad people the way you mentioned, and this is the reason I don't always use mental illness as a reason for their terrible actions.

The unfortunate thing about writing fiction is that no matter what a novelist writes, there will always be at least a few readers who feel offended or like the writer is not being sensitive to his or her particular situation. Especially, if a writer focuses on taboo or controversial subjects the way I always do.

I hope my explanation is helpful and thanks again for all your support, Ashley.

Take care and God bless,

[Author's name]

After sending the email I wish I would have listed some sources to get educated about mental health. And after the explanation, well, what do you think?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

NAMI Connections Training Wrap Up

2010-07-19T10:48:00.003-04:00

After the NAMI Connections facilitator training I feel empowered! We covered some touchy topics such as how to handle someone that is suicidal and other effective facilitator techniques. I especially liked the problem-solving strategies we learned to help someone in the support group who has a concern.

I have been to a few facilitator trainings, however, NAMI Connections was the most effective to me. Again, I got to meet people with similar desires to give back and to support others.

In short, NAMI Connections is a support group for 10 to 15 people living with a mental health diagnosis. The meeting lasts about 90 minutes. There you can get plenty of resources, support from other consumers, and express yourself and know that you are not alone.

Overall, the experience was great and I would strongly encourage other people who want to further advocate and contribute to the mental health community to get involved with NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness). Go NAMI!

If you would like to learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

NAMI Connections Training

2010-07-17T13:42:00.003-04:00

I am still going through the NAMI GA Connections training and it is going very well. The hotel stay and food is great. I am meeting a lot of nice people and learning how to be an even better facilitator. I love NAMI! And I strongly encourage people living with a psychiatric diagnosis as well as family and friends to get involved.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Unique Memories

2010-07-14T13:40:00.004-04:00

After I shared my story with an interested party who is working on a project I thought of the many symptoms and situations I left out of my testimony...

I didn't tell him about the milk cartons, or the mind reading, and the images that made me do a quick u-turn. Now, I am in recovery mode I feel comfortable sharing the many experiences I recall during my episode with paranoid schizophrenia.

For example, I remember not believing what anyone told me concerning the date or other things. I felt like I had an intimate relationship with God to the extent that he sent me private messages, and that I can even have a greater understanding of Him. Instead of believing what people said the date was, I looked at milk cartons to get the real date, this was a message sent from God, I thought.

I remember going to church, like I usually did, however, communicating with the pastor's wife through my mind. I looked at her, and knew she understood me. Strangely, I even thought she may think I would want to take her husband from her, but I told her in mind that I did not. It was all very bizarre.

The day the carpet was lifted right from beneath me I recall watching the Trinity network and watching the end of the program to get the tape information only to see the words: "How to commit suicide" on the screen. I felt very uncomfortable and turned off the television immediately. Then later, I received messages from the devil through the radio in a song about girls. I just knew the devil was playing game with me, again. But my faith was strong and kept on keeping on, like I am now...

As life comes with many obstacles and ups and downs in relationships, I am at peace. I know that the Lord has my back and that it will all work out in the end. Thank you for reading about these strange memories. I hopoe if you have a mental illness or know someone who does you will seek education and support. Thank you again!

If you would like to learn more information about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Novia Scotia (Canada).

Everything is Well

2010-07-06T15:06:00.003-04:00

I am well. Staying busy. The Peer-to-Peer group is coming to an end. We have a great group, attendance is high and everyone is enthusiatic about the group.

If you live in Georgia, you may want to take advantage of a NAMI Georgia Connections training July 16-18, 2010 at Mercer University. Please visit the NAMI Georgia website for details at www.namiga.org.

I hope everyone enjoyed the fourth of July!

NAMI Efforts

2010-06-13T22:16:00.004-04:00

Let me give a recap as to what happening: last month I received an award from NAMI Georgia, "Mentor of the Year" for my role in NAMI's Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course. I feel really good about it, honored to be recognized for the effort and very excited about it.

Now, I am leading another NAMI Peer-to-Peer class. It is going very well, participants are very engaged and willing to share. I feel really good about the group, many of us can relate to each other and that is awesome.

If you are interested in learning more about schizophrenia visit NAMI or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

EMM Update

2010-04-12T14:03:00.003-04:00

A lot is going on with Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM). First, the Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course came to close last Saturday. We celebrated with some cake and had a very good time.

This weekend Embracing My Mind,Inc. will be an exhibitor at the International Medical Volunteerism Conference at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia. We are excited about the opportunity.

Wednesday, April 21, Embracing My Mind, Inc. will start facilitating groups at Fulton County Superior Mental Health Court in Atlanta, Georgia.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit: Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

10 Everyday Stress Management Techniques

2010-04-05T16:17:00.003-04:00

by Teresa Jackson

Some of us are better at it than others, and even though we all know that we must do it for health reasons, stress management is not that easy for most of us. In today’s hectic world, it’s almost impossible to avoid stress – even children are stressed out what with peer and parental pressure tugging at them from opposite sides. So the best thing to do is to find ways to manage it as best we can so that it does not affect our health adversely. Managing stress on a daily basis is not that difficult; all you need to do is:

1. Don’t take yourself too seriously: Life is short, so enjoy it in the right way. Allow time for fun and frolic even in the midst of your busy schedule.
2. Make plans, but don’t obsess over it if they fall through: Making plans and adhering to them is the best way to beat stress. But when those plans fall apart, find ways to improvise rather than falling apart yourself.
3. Make time to laugh and enjoy yourself: Laughter is the best medicine, so spend time with people who make you laugh or watch a sitcom or funny movie on the idiot box to laugh your heart out.
4. Do what you love or love what your do: It’s important to love your job if you want to avoid stress, so if you hate what you do, find ways to enjoy it or quit and find something you love.
5. Surround yourself with people who love you: Love is a great stress buster, so nurture healthy relationships. Regular sex with your partner releases negative feelings and beats stress. Also, spending time with your family and friends helps you distress easily.
6. Exercise for 30 minutes: Go for a walk or a jog if you feel depressed – it’s one of the best ways to beat stress.
7. Eat healthy food, with a cherry at the top: Don’t turn to ice cream and chocolate to chase away the blues; rather, eat healthy food and allow yourself a few spoons of dessert or other food that you love as a treat. When you turn to food for comfort, you tend to put on weight and add to your stress levels.
8. Be content with what you have: When you don’t expect too much and don’t envy other people, you’re able to lead a happy and stress-free life.
9. Don’t smoke, drink or do drugs: While alcohol is ok on a social basis, stay away from smoking and drugs if you want to avoid stress and other health complications.
10. Learn to let go: And finally, learn to let go of emotions, situations and people who have a negative effect on you and your life. When you hold on to unhealthy feelings and relationships that are long past their prime, you’re only subjecting yourself to more stress and further angst.

Remember, stress is the biggest killer of all – you may be eating right, exercising regularly, and leading a successful life; but if you’re stressed out most of the time or if you suffer a sudden shock or emotional trauma, you could be placing your life in jeopardy. So learn how to take things easy and to relax when the going gets tough so that stress does not become your main enemy.

By-line:
This guest article is written by Teresa Jackson, she writes on the subject of OnlineNursePractitionerSchools. She invites your questions, comments at her email address : teresa.jackson19@gmail.com.

Feedback on Radio Interview

2010-03-22T08:40:00.003-04:00

(Sorry for delay). I just posted my radio interview with Kim Iverson from January 29, 2010. If you skip ahead to the blue dot, on the box to the right, that says schizophrenia or at about 23 minutes you could listen to the interview.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Addiction and Mental Health

2010-03-20T16:14:00.003-04:00

Just came back from mentoring a NAMI Peer-to-Peer class. We had another great class. This time we discussed addiction and mental health. We talked about the history of 12 step programs and various addictions. I had a really good time with the group, and I look forward to next week's class.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Overcoming Stigma One Story at a Time

2010-03-19T16:40:00.001-04:00

Because of stigma, some people still want to see consumers (individuals living with a mental illness) institutionalized (i.e., in jail or in a hospital). This is ridiculous! Consumers can and do get better so why should We be put away, out of sight, and out of mind?!

In fact, I was once institutionalized for a situation I created as a result of my untreated, (and during that time, unknown) mental illness. I experienced a plethora of schizophrenia symptoms, yet I did not understand what was happening, all I knew was that I was extremely confused, disoriented, and scared.

I saw strange people following me, an old man on an antique bicycle and a crowd of people, heard demeaning voices (which I thought was someone playing a prank on me and was coming from my cell phone because the voices sounded like an exaggeration of mean cartoon characters). I thought I has special gifts from God like the ability to read minds and decipher evil spirits and good spirits in people. I thought I was a prophet of God and then eventually I thought I was Jesus Christ being prosecuted all over again.

I remember feeling trapped like I could not trust anyone. I thought my family was against me, I thought the world was against me. My symptoms lead me to be an uptight, secretive, irritated individual. I had unnecessary arguments with relatives, and even accused them of tapping my cell phone and hiding my purse. My undiagnosed illness lead me to miss appointments, quit my job, and to not trust family who are nothing but loving in reality.

Finally, I had enough and I left. I was missing from my family for what seemed like forever, but it was actually about a week, which was long enough to worry them to death and contemplate the worse. However, I was not hurt, thank God, or on the streets wondering around, I was in jail. This surprised everyone, including myself, before this incident I had a clean record with no run-ins with the police, not even a traffic violation.

When I woke up in jail I was so immersed in my mental illness symptoms I believed I had died and went to hell. I thought I was in hell because when I went outside and tried the foundation water and it was extremely hot and the weather was hot- this still does not make sense, I know, however, symptoms of schizophrenia impairs rational thinking and ability to make rational connections in conversation and daily activities. California, where I was diagnosed, had a heat wave.

I was institutionalized (in the state hospital and in jail) for five months because of the crime I committed. Fortunately, I was diagnosed with schizophrenia and forced to receive treatment in order to face the charges against me, and I was granted "Time-served," on the basis of my diagnosis, character references, and clean legal background. After my doctor got my consent to talk to my mother about my treatment, he told her I had a great chance at recovery and leading a normal life. This gave my mother peace of mind because before that, she contemplated being my legal guardian because my symptoms affected me so bad.

I was catatonic for a while, not moving limbs for hours at a time, did not eat or shower for days, and did not socialize with the other inmates. And, I was sent to the emergency room several times because I was not eating or drinking. Also, I was in denial and tried to refuse medication. Moreover, nurses had to get the jail guards to hold me down to give me a shot because I refused the oral form of my medication. I began to accept my diagnosis after a jail nurse told me- 'look, Ashley, we had to send to the ER several times because you were not eating... that is not normal... you are sick.'

After my family paid for my bail and I was released into the community, I participated in an outpatient treatment program for young adults (which I was referred to by my social worker in jail). I stayed in the program for 10 months before moving back to Atlanta to be with my mother and sister. When I arrived to Atlanta I immediately sought out a treatment program with the county because other options cost too much.

My sister suggested I start blogging to keep track of my recovery, and the Overcoming Schizophrenia blog was established in September 2008. She also recommended the book, Welcome Silence, which is a must read for people affected by schizophrenia or mental illness.

I had a vision of mentoring and assisting peers on their path to recovery and Embracing My Mind, Inc. was forming. I received training from NAMI to mentor the Peer-to-Peer class and then I started leading groups in the Atlanta area. This fall I plan on going back to college to get my bachelor's degree in business administration and marketing.

I continue to share my story with you because I want to reinforce the idea of hope, recovery, and a normal life for people affected by mental illness. Stigma, the invisible beast, limits peoples' access to services in the community and even support from family. If you are a caregiver, family member, or a consumer remember my story and believe they or you can and will get better with support. Thank you for reading my story, I encourage you to share yours and mine with others to reduce stigma.

Sincerely,
Ashley Smith

To learn more about schizophrenia go to Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Discussion-Based Groups and Coalition Meeting

2010-03-18T02:25:00.001-04:00

Today, I observed a new support group in order to build rapport with the clients. Soon, Embracing My Mind, Inc. will provide peer support services at this facility. We discussed self-esteem and low self-esteem. We had a great discussion.

By observing someone else's facilitation style it gave me ideas on how to improve on my own mentoring abilities. The group was discussion-based with no handouts or note-taking necessary. I think it was very relaxing for the clients they were able to relate the discussion to personal experiences. I will try to focus on having more discussion-based groups in order to have a more laid-back setting and to get even more participation.

Also, I participated in a coalition meeting. We discussed recovery and addiction. Groups are forming to develop some type of peer specialist for addiction and recovery, like mental illness, I am very excited about this new approach to recovery. I do not have a substance abuse concern, however, dual diagnosis or a combination of mental illness and substance abuse is a major concern.

To learn more about schizophrenia go to Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Review of the Movie A Beautiful Mind

2010-03-17T00:27:00.001-04:00

We finished watching the movie, A Beautiful Mind, starring Russell Crowe. After the movie I asked some questions such as:

1) What type of symptoms did John portray?
2) Why did he stop taking his medicine?
3) Is he violent towards himself or others?

Answers

The main character, John Nash, experienced hallucinations, delusions, and paranoia as a result of his illness schizophrenia. His hallucinations included his roommate Charles, Charles' niece Marcy, and government of defense supervisor William Parcher. His delusions led him to believe he was more than a professor, he believed he was a spy and could break codes by review of specific magazines and newspapers.

He stopped taking his medicine for several reasons: he could not do his work, could not respond to his wife, and could not help out with the baby and the house. Other reasons why an individual with a mental illness may stop taking their medicine may be because they believe they are cured, don't want to endure the harsh side effects, and ran out of medicine (perhaps because of money or forgot to take them).

The last question was tricky. Generally, he was not violent to himself or others however hallucinations led him to cause harm to himself and to his wife and child in the movie. In the movie, he believed that the government implanted a chip into his arm in order to get the access code to the drop box for classified packages. While in the hospital he clawed at his arm to get the implant out which never was there in reality. Also, while Parcher was about to shoot his wife and child, he pushed his wife while holding their baby to protect her, yet this still was a violent act.

Another important point the movie made was how even though John was on medication he could still experience some persistent symptoms such as the hallucinations, which is true for some people.

The great thing about the movie is that it also shows how a person can overcome the illness. For instance, whenever he was unsure about whether an individual was a hallucination or not he asked a trusted stander by.

Overall, the movie demonstrated an accurate account of the impact of schizophrenia on the individual diagnosed with it and their family and friends. At one point in the movie, Alicia, John's wife, explains her frustration and anger towards God and her husband, and then she remembers the man she married and everything is okay.

I am very pleased with the movie and recommend it to other people who are interested in schizophrenia.

To learn more about schizophrenia go to Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Checking In on My Health

2010-03-15T15:17:00.004-04:00

The other day I spoke to a relative and they told me I sounded very well. They asked me how everything was concerning my medication and how was school. I am doing very well, the medication I am on helps tremendously and I am thankful to have my mind back and am able to do activities I enjoy doing such as participating in groups and leading group sessions. I plan on starting school this fall. I know I keep pushing it back, but I am hopeful that I will actually start college again soon.

When I start school I plan on taking two classes at the most and leading one to two peer groups on the side. If it is too stressful I'll just drop one course and focus on the one course and my groups. It sounds like a lot I know, but I think I will be able to manage it if I continue to participate in group therapy and communicate with my support system (i.e., people I trust and can rely on such as my family, therapist and doctor).

I want to make something clear schizophrenia or any illness for that matter does not affect everybody the same way, and that goes for medication as well. For example, just because one type of medicine works for Bob it does not mean that that same medication will work for Sue.

Also, there are different types of schizophrenia (i.e., paranoid, undifferentiated, residual, disorganized, and catatonic), and several medications to choose from. I am fortunate that my doctor and I found a medication that works for me (I tried a few medications before finding the right one). I knew the other medications were not for me because of their side effects, the medication I am on now has little side effects that is manageable.

To learn more about schizophrenia go to Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

International Medical Volunteerism Conference in Atlanta, GA

2010-03-15T07:48:00.003-04:00

The International Medical Volunteerism Conference is a free conference and is open to the general public. The Conference is on April 16th-18th, 2010 at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia.

Also, Embracing My Mind, Inc. will be an exhibitor, so join us! For details on Conference registration, speakers, and exhibitors click here.

To learn more about schizophrenia go to Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

What is Stigma?

2010-03-15T02:38:00.001-04:00

First, stigma relates to negative perceptions often fueled by lack of education about schizophrenia and other mental illnesses. According to Mental Health: Culture, Race, and Ethnicity, A Supplement to Mental Health: A Report of the Surgeon General, 2001 stigma "refers to a cluster of negative attitudes and beliefs that motivate the general public to fear, reject, avoid, and discriminate against people with mental illness." Stigma can pronounce itself in self-image. The Report also states that stigma leaves such a negative impact on consumers (individuals living with a psychiatric disorder) that some people have low self-esteem and less access to resources such as housing, employment, and even mental health treatment because of the stigma associated with the illness.

The Report goes further to examine the extent of stigma in Asian cultures where "mental illness is thought to reflect poorly on family lineage and thereby diminishes marriage and economic prospects for other family members as well." Here in America, phrase and thoughts such as: "Not in my backyard" syndrome, decreased interest in birthing children because of fear the illness will pass on to them, not employing people with mental illness, etc. these are all forms of stigma at its best.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) states that one out of four adults have mental illness. A 2008 NAMI survey found that only 24 percent of survey participants of the general public are familiar with schizophrenia. This explains why there is such confusion as what schizophrenia is and is not, for instance, schizophrenia is NOT a split personality, however, the term does mean "split mind".

Mental illness is widespread and does NOT discriminate against ethnicity, race, age, gender, economic background, and any other distinguishing factors. It is crucial that we address stigma and try to eliminate it before it perverts all societies to its most inhumane means of associating with and handling consumers and their families, friends, coworkers, and others.

Education and more exposure to mental illness can dramatically reduce stigma. Therefore, learning as much as one can about mental illness limits misconceptions. What are some ways an individual can advocate against stigma?

To learn more about schizophrenia visit the following websites: Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

PASS Program for SSI Recipients

2010-03-14T21:21:00.003-04:00

After a friend told me about the Plans to Achieve Self-Support (PASS) program I did some research on it and it is a great program. The program benefits people who have Supplemental Security Income (SSI).

PASS allows SSI recipients to earn additional resources or income and put it aside to pay for education, to start a business, to fund training, etc. Under the program, the person will not lose their SSI benefits, and their SSI will not be reduced. To learn about the program click here.

To learn more about schizophrenia check out Embracing My Mind, Inc., the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

A Beautiful Mind- The Movie

2010-03-14T00:08:00.000-05:00

Group sessions are going very well, we get participation from most of the group members. Last week we studied schizophrenia- what it is, its types, and symptoms. Moreover, we started watching the movie, A Beautiful Mind, with Russell Crowe. We plan on finishing the movie this week.

I highly recommend the movie because of its uniqueness, in that it shows how the person with schizophrenia views reality. I would tell you lots more, but I don't want to spoil it for those of you who have not seen it... Rent it, buy it, download it, etc.- it is a must see if interested in schizophrenia.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

New Schizophrenia Blog- Dustin Demoss

2010-03-13T23:37:00.003-05:00

Discovered a new blog about schizophrenia. Includes personal experiences, facts, and more... The blog is called Dustin Demoss. Check it out.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM), National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), and Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Join Us on Facebook- New Feature!

2010-03-13T17:46:00.003-05:00

ANNOUNCEMENT:

Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM) is now on Facebook. We hope you will visit us and become a fan. That way we can keep you in the loop as to the daily happenings with the organization. Enjoy!

Take care,
Ashley

Peer Program/Mental Health Day at the Capitol

2010-03-04T14:08:00.002-05:00

I participated in two events this week: 1) Fulton County, Georgia Commissioner's meeting and 2) Mental Health Day at the Capitol orchestrated by Behavioral Health Services Coalition.

I spoke at the Commissioner's meeting yesterday to advocate in favor of the Peer Program at South Fulton Mental Health Center in East Point, Georgia. The county wants to close the Peer Program, and myself and other peers spoke against this consideration.

Today, I attended Mental Health Day at the Capitol and distributed business cards to introduce my non-profit organization, Embracing My Mind, Inc. The program discussed advance directives, Georgia's budget, children and adolescents with mental health concerns, a personal story, and an overview of Olmstead.

Advance Directives are plans for consumers in the event they cannot make decisions on their own, it is kind of like a crisis plan that describes medications desired to get well again, and who may make decisions on behalf of the consumer.

A statistic I remember about children and adolescents with mental health concerns is the average age of onset is 14. This does not surprise me, in fact, I thought the age would be younger.

Overall, I enjoyed the program and networking. Also, my groups are going very well.

To my new followers (anyone who started following this blog since January 2010) I am glad that we found each other, I hope you learn something new about schizophrenia and if you have any questions related to it feel free to ask me. I appreciate all of my readers, thank you!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

New Group

2010-02-15T08:13:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow I am starting another group at a new location, Hope Through Divine Intervention, Inc. Villas of Hope project. I am very excited about the group, I will share more details afterward.

Also, I started carrying out groups at the Samaritan House of Atlanta- Cafe 458 again last week. The group went very well. We discussed mental health myths and common thinking mistakes. The group was excited to have me return.

I found a grant that I am very interested in I hope it is a good fit for Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM) I will tell you if we will apply or not. EMM really needs a seed grant to kick off a more efficient program.

HAPPY PRESIDENT'S DAY!!!

Early Symptoms of Schizophrenia in Teens

2010-02-04T11:47:00.002-05:00

The following articles was written by the talented, Wendy Graham freelancer. She contributes to OnlineCollegeGuru.org, a guide to online colleges.

Despite recent efforts to educate the public about schizophrenia, many misconceptions about the disease still persist. Schizophrenia is a chronic disorder that often has its first onset in the late teens or during early adulthood. Its symptoms can be disorienting and even frightening both for the affected person and for those around him or her; typically, the earlier the first onset of symptoms, the more severe the case of schizophrenia is likely to be. More men than women are affected by this chronic mental condition, and men are usually more seriously affected than women on average. Fortunately, there are effective treatments that can reduce symptoms and provide real help for teenagers who have been diagnosed with schizophrenia; by identifying the symptoms of schizophrenia, parents and educators can help teens get the help they need to control their illness.

Teens with schizophrenia often become withdrawn and suspicious, and may even become hostile to those closest to them. The first onset of schizophrenia often produces many of the same symptoms as depression, with loss of interest in daily activities, poor personal hygiene, and forgetfulness; since depression is also a serious mental condition, teens exhibiting these symptoms should be seen by a physician in order to diagnose the cause of their difficulties. Other early symptoms include odd speech patterns or vocalizations and inappropriate laughing or crying without an obvious stimulus. Ironically, the lack of all emotional reaction is also a classic sign of schizophrenia; flatness of affect and reduced facial expressions are often exhibited during the first stages of schizophrenia. Many teens react in an extreme fashion to criticism or comments directed at them, and some may make irrational or nonsensical statements in response to questions. While none of these symptoms is direct evidence of schizophrenia, teens who exhibit a number of these behaviors should be examined by a physician in order to determine if schizophrenia might be the cause.

Classic symptoms of schizophrenia include visual and auditory hallucinations, delusions, disorganized speech and behavior, and the absence of certain common behaviors present in healthy individuals. Characteristics like slurred speech, strange and unsupported beliefs, an unrealistic level of belief in conspiracy theories, and paranoia are all positive symptoms of schizophrenia. Negative symptoms include the absence of facial expressions, lack of eye contact, severe reduction in frequency of speech and movement, and loss of verbal fluency. Medication can reduce or temper the frequency of some symptoms of schizophrenia, while psychotherapy can help teens deal with the adverse affects of their condition as well. By recognizing the early symptoms of schizophrenia, parents and other adults can help teens get the help they need to control their illness and regain control of their lives.

Radio Interview Experience

2010-01-30T08:29:00.003-05:00

The radio interview went VERY well! Kim Iverson (radio talk show host) and I discussed episodes, her personal experience with mental illness through her mother, and how family reacts to one suffering an illness.

I shared how I realized that something was wrong after a nurse contemplated with me that I was sick because I had been to the emergency room several times for not eating and I was not taking care of myself; showering or even moving! Kim's mother had an episode and Kim was forced to drop out of college to take over her mother's business while she was sick.

The interview was for about seven minutes. I felt really good about sharing my story and the interview overall. Thank you for everyone's support on this event!

And a special thanks goes to kim Iverson and her radio staff for having me on the show and for allowing me to share my story. Thank you!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit Embracing My Mind, Inc., NAMI, or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Radio Interview w/ Kim Iverson

2010-01-28T18:48:00.004-05:00

I will be featured on Kim Iverson's radio talk show tomorrow night on Friday, January 29, 2010. We will discuss my personal experience with schizophrenia, so tune in! These are the radio stations:

(www.yourtimewithkim.com)
AUSTIN- KAMX (7PM-Midnight)
BUFFALO- WTSS (7PM-Midnight)
DENVER- KALC (7PM- Midnight)
INDIANAPOLIS- WZPL (7PM- Midnight)
KANSAS CITY- KKSN (7PM-Midnight)
MEMPHIS- WMC-FM (7PM- Midnight)
NORFLOK- WPTE (7PM- Midngith)
PORTLAND- KRSK (7PM- Midnight)
WICHITA- KFBZ (6PM- 11PM)

Thank you for your support!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit NAMI, Embracing My Mind, Inc., or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Peer-to-Peer Turnout

2010-01-24T14:05:00.004-05:00

The Peer-to-Peer Orientation on Saturday had a great turnout. Fifteen people attended the event and nine people signed up for the course. During the event we had a group discussion on myths and misconceptions of mental illness. Almost everybody participated in the discussion which made me very happy. Also, I was able to share my story.

If you are interested in attending NAMI's Peer-to-Peer course you may participate in the first group meeting on January 30th at 1 pm. There are nine classes, the group is from 1-3pm. Location: at the cafe at 2001 Martin Luther King Drive, Atlanta, GA 30315. For more information contact me, Ashley, at 1-888-839-3191.

For more information on schizophrenia you may go to the following sites:

1) Embracing My Mind, Inc. (EMM)
2) National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)
3) Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada)

Speak Out, Support Your Peers--Wed. Jan. 20th

2010-01-19T09:39:00.001-05:00

Fulton County mental health centers are debating to discontinue offering services to people living with a mental health diagnosis, who do not have health insurance. This is an outrage!

When I first moved back to Atlanta I did not have health insurance, however, the center assisted me with group therapy and enabled me to participate in a program to help me get my medicine. I am very thankful for the Abilify Assistance Program. How many other people are in the same predicament?

There will be an open forum on Wednesday, January 20, 2010 (tomorrow) at 10 AM in the Fulton County Government Center Assembly Hall, 141 Pryor Street SW, Atlanta, Georgia. This meeting is open to the public.

People like you and I can attend the meeting and share views on the matter. I will definitely be there to support peers in need and to comment on the situation. If the County discontinues providing needed services such as therapy and medication for people without health insurance we are in trouble!

For more information you may contact the Office of the Clerk to the Commission, (404) 612-8200 or visit the Fulton County website at www.fultoncountyga.gov. If you live in the Atlanta area, please support this meeting!

Peer-to-Peer Orientation

2010-01-18T17:46:00.002-05:00

Hi,

Me and a peer will lead a NAMI group called Peer-to-Peer Recovery Education Course. The class is FREE open to all groups living with a mental health diagnosis. The nine-week class focuses on relapse prevention planning among several other coping strategies. Orientation is Saturday, January 23, 2010 at 2 p.m. located at 2001 Martin Luther King Drive, Atlanta, GA 30315.

The class will meet each Saturday starting January 30, 2010 and ending April 10, 2010. For more information about Peer-to-Peer call me, Ashley, at (888) 839-3191 or visit the NAMI website at www.nami.org. Oh yeah, and did I say the class is FREE!

(Note: This is not an Embracing My Mind, Inc. group. The Peer-to-Peer course is affiliated with the National Alliance on Mental Illness organization.)

To learn more information about schizophrenia visit NAMI or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

New Changes to EMM Website

2010-01-17T16:32:00.001-05:00

Hi,

Recently, I made some changes to our Embracing My Mind,Inc. (EMM) website. I would love for each of you to check out the site (again) or for the very first time and to give feedback. Oh yeah and don't forget to sign the guest book, to check out the "Upcoming Events" page, and well EVERYTHING. Thank you for your support!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Yesterday's Woman's Group

2010-01-14T08:59:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I participated in a woman's support group at the place where I receive treatment. I have not been to this group in a few months so I saw some familiar faces and some new faces. I was really looking forward to the group, and I am glad I went. We expressed a range of emotions throughout the meeting about each of our feelings and outlook on life.

One question came up about someone's mental illness: is it pride or depression? The individual was isolated, but wanted someone to reach out to them, but just didn't know how to get someone else's attention. I thought that was a very interesting question, me not knowing much about depression learned a lot. The answer to the question, was it is depression and NOT pride.

My therapist said it plainly, depression is 'detached, dejected, guilty, and isolated.' The group came up with suggestions to reach out to others. We came up with several ideas and agreed on one- start small, don't send a mass mailing of thinking of you cards, start small.

Also, during the meeting I spoke to my therapist about my vivid dreams, (which I discussed in my post a few days ago titled "Red Flag") because the clerk never called me back to reschedule my appointment with my doctor, and when I called back the receptionist said the appointment clerk will call me back; just a lot of run-around. Anyway, my therapist said I should definitely mention the vivid dreams to my doctor. However, she also said because I did not have any changes to medication recently, I could just be a vivid dreamer.

Customer Service

2010-01-12T09:04:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, I called my doctor's office to reschedule my appointment for an earlier date, instead of March, to discuss my vivid dreams with him. Instead of scheduling me for an earlier appointment, the receptionist asked me why I want to reschedule. And I replied 'I want to discuss some side effects of my medicine with my doctor'. Why was that necessary, what if I had other plans and just wanted to reschedule, would they deny me?

Anyway, they were booked the month of January so I am trying for the next best thing, February. The receptionist asked me for my phone number so they can call me back with another appointment date. (Note I called in the morning to reschedule the appointment) An hour before the clinic closes I called them back for my appointment date, the same receptionist told me that the appointment clerk does not get her messages until the end of the day, and will call me back with another appointment date tomorrow. Well, I wish he would have said something before so I would not expect a phone call from the clinic all day. So, hopefully, they will call me back today with the appointment. Effective customer service, uh?

The Second Time Around

2010-01-11T15:12:00.003-05:00

I just applied for the Georgia Certified Peer Specialist training. The training takes place in the beginning of February and will last two weeks. Last time I applied and was denied because there were so many applicants, I hope this time I will get into the training program.

This training is very important to me because it is recognized by the state and will officially allow me to guide others on their path to recovery. This will give me more experience on how to help others. Plus this certification will prove to others that I am serious about my goal to help other people living with a mental illness. Please wish me luck, and I keep you posted on my status!

Red Flag

2010-01-09T09:13:00.003-05:00

I have been having vivid dreams for a long time now. After sharing this information with my step-father he said that a red flag popped up in his mind and that I should discuss this information with my doctor. My medicine could be causing me to have vivid dreams.

I did not know it was an issue, having vivid dreams, but I will reschedule my appointment with my doctor for an earlier date to get his opinion on the matter. Now, I am fascinated by my dreams, I go to an online dream dictionary to interpret them, and sometimes the interpretation is right.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit NAMI or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Shifting Gears

2010-01-06T14:14:00.001-05:00

Today I had a little setback, actually it is a HUGE setback, it's about my school. I visited a financial aid counselor to discover that my school has not received my information from FASFA yet. It is a four week process and tuition is due next Friday, I know I cannot get that kind of money in time. Therefore, my financial aid is on hold so I will not be able to start school this semester. This upsets me, but not totally. I'll focus my attention on facilitating more groups and carrying out needed trainings, such as Georgia's Certified Peer Specialist Project.

The training is for people living with a diagnosis of mental illness or dual diagnosis. It prepares people to provide peer support to other individuals living with a diagnosis. There are organizations that seek Certified Peer Specialist (CPS), this certification would definitely benefit my organization Embracing My Mind, Inc. It costs $85 excluding hotel expenses. I've applied to the training before but was denied because there were so many applicants. I'll try again, wish me luck!

Changes

2010-01-03T14:29:00.003-05:00

In the spirit of the holiday season I updated the template, I hope you like! This year is going to be my year... I am starting school in a couple of weeks and a new fun project, I am facilitating a NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) group called Peer-to-Peer Education with a couple of my peers from the NAMI training I did back in September. I am very excited about the group. We will start it in a couple of weeks as well. The class provides education on various serious mental illnesses and allows group participation on several exciting activities.

With all of the holiday spirit I have been very lazy and neglecting my followers, I'll make it up to them by blogging more frequently. Now it's time for me to work on the flier for the group.

HAPPY NEW YEAR:)

Back on Track

2009-12-20T15:35:00.004-05:00

I am going back to school in January 2010. I am very excited about this opportunity and this new challenge. Prior to my diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia I dropped out of college because of many stresses. Since then I have attended a junior college and now I am transferring to a four-year university to get my bachelors degree in marketing. I have overcome many hurdles to get to where I am now and I am very proud. Because of my mental illness I plan on taking a light course load.

However, I will continue to maintain my blog, Overcoming Schizophrenia, and my support groups with Embracing My Mind, Inc. To ensure success at my endeavors I will continue to attend group therapy and cooperate with my mental health professionals by taking my medication regularly, keeping appointments, and communicating needs.

This is huge ya'll! Going back to school has been my goal ever since I stopped attending college in 2007. I am moving forward in my life and in my recovery, and I am very happy!!!

Recovery to me is taking care of self, doing the things I used to do such as go to school or work, and maintaining a stable mind in order to process thoughts and to communicate with others.

Happy Holidays!!!

Positive?!

2009-11-24T11:33:00.002-05:00

Someone commented on one of my posts and implied that I was too positive. There will be ups and downs for the individual living with a mental illness as well as for their family and/or caregiver.

However, I am at a very positive state in my life right now, but it has not always been the case. To tell you the truth I went through hell to get to where I am now, and I've written many blogs on the horrible experiences I've encountered while living with this illness!

Can you imagine being watched constantly, and everyone around you are after you? And you are scared because you are outnumbered!

I had a nervous breakdown at the age of 20, I heard voices, saw strange people, and was disoriented. Psychosis led me to do something stupid and that incident led me to jail and to the state hospital for five months. Prior to this incident I never went to jail or committed a crime.

I isolated myself during that time in my life from everyone. I even told my mother I didn't want to see her anymore, which was very hurtful. I denied visits from family even though I wanted to see them, my mind played many tricks on me, and at the time I was a wreck because I did not understand why I was acting the way I was.

I was hungry many times but I refused to eat and drink because I believed someone was trying to poison me. This is the paranoia that many people living with a mental illness experience. I heard discouraging, awful, mean voices that nobody else could hear. I remember the voices telling me I was a dishonor to my family, and that I could not survive on my own. Sometimes there were multiple voices at once which frustrated me.

For a while I wouldn't speak, shower, or even leave my room to eat or go outside. Sometimes I wouldn't sleep because I thought my peers in jail would attack me in my sleep, this led to high anxiety and additional stress. I would experience panic attacks, nurses held brown bags over my face in order for me to breath and gave me anxiety medication.

Guards held me down in order for nurses to give me shots because I refused to take the oral form or medication, my family encouraged medication compliance by the judge, after all that I did not believe I was sick! And the side effects of these medications were very uncomfortable, I had to stay in constant movement I was so restless, and as a result I couldn't sleep. Another medication made me sleep all the time and it made it hard for me to stay awake during groups. One medication made me so stiff peers called me a robot.

I've shared these incidents over a range of diverse posts. So when someone says I am too positive I do not apologize, haven't I been through enough? I just hope that others will see the light soon and experience something that will make them feel more positive too.

Thank you for reading about my story and for giving your opinions on my experiences.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Thanks

2009-11-22T11:50:00.001-05:00

I ended one of my groups the other day by going around the room and letting people share what they are thankful for.(I lead closed groups, not open to the public, at various facilities).

I am thankful that I am able to function well, organize, research, and to lead groups. As you probably already know, if you follow this blog regularly, I have come a long way to get to where I am now. In the past, schizophrenia tried to hinder me, take away my speech, make it hard for me to recognize family, and almost kill me by my excessive paranoia and determination not eat or drink. But now, I have hold on my brain disorder; I take my medication regularly, I continue to learn more about different mental illnesses, and I have support of family, friends, and health professionals.

What are you thankful for?

If you have a mental health concern such as schizophrenia, you are not alone, I can understand you. If you are a caregiver, family member, or friend of someone living with a mental illness believe that recovery is possible and that your special someone can get better. I am living proof that people living with a mental illness do come back and live productive, independent lives!

For those of you learning what schizophrenia is for the first time, it is a thought disorder that is difficult to treat but is treatable. There is no cure for it, yet, however with a combination of medication and support people living with schizophrenia can lead fulfilling lives. I am one of them.

If you want to learn more about schizophrenia visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

Stereotypes- A Voice or a Sound We Should Ignore

2009-11-21T19:23:00.002-05:00

Society has programmed many people living without mental illness to believe that those living with mental illness are bad. The media has played a huge role in brain washing people to think negatively about other people with brain disorders. They cannot do the same things I do, they are violent, they are crazy, the people without mental illness are led to believe.

And, many people with mental illnesses believe these lies. The people with mental illnesses limit their goals and believe they cannot lead a productive, independent, full life in many instances as a result of stigma.

DO NOT LISTEN TO THAT VOICE (the stereotypes). An individual with mental illness can and do accomplish many things despite mental health concerns. In fact, people that have a mental illness should use these stereotypes as motivation to overcome them. For those of you living with a mental illness I hope you will challenge yourself and excel at it.

At one point, I was not functioning well. I did not speak, bath, eat, or leave my room. In fact, I was catatonic, not moving my limbs for hours at a time. Schizophrenia had the best of me, or so others thought. After taking various medications for weeks and coupled with group therapy I came back to life, Ashley emerged out that mental state and I was able to take control again. Don't let others' expectations bring you down!

A little background knowledge on what schizophrenia is: it is a thought disorder that confuses and jumbles thoughts and speech for some. It creeps up on an individual usually in early adulthood. Symptoms may include, but are not limited to the following (this list is not intended diagnose anyone, if in doubt seek professional assistance):

- Paranoia
- Sleep disturbances
- Hallucinations
- Delusions
- Isolation
- Speech disturbances
- Short term memory loss
- Disorientation
- Inability to recognize friends and family
- Appetite disturbances
- Suicidal thoughts
- Religious preoccupation
- Poor concentration

I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia at the age of twenty. There are different types of schizophrenia such as paranoid, catatonic, residual, and undifferentiated. There is no cure for schizophrenia, yet, but there is treatment. however, everybody does not respond to the same medication is it's basically trial and error when finding the right medication to treat someone with schizophrenia.

I hope that this information was beneficial to you. If you have a mental disorder such as schizophrenia, I want you to know that you can achieve whatever you want.

If you do not have a mental disorder I hope you know more about what schizophrenia is and that people with brain disorders are NOT violent, crazy, and we can and do achieve goals!

To learn more about schizophrenia visit NAMI or Schizophrenia Society of Nova Scotia (Canada).

HOPE: The Strength to Overcome

2009-11-16T08:53:00.006-05:00

It has been two years since I was released from the institution, in jail and in the state hospital, in California. After my release I was thirsty for knowledge about my illness, schizophrenia.

I remember going to the nearby pharmacy to get a prescription and then doing research on the computer on schizophrenia. I got involved in an outpatient treatment facility, called Providence Community Services: Catalyst, in San Diego through a referral from my social worker in jail.

At that point I did not have a clue that I would strive to help others with mental health concerns by sharing my experience on a blog or leading groups. I did not even know what blogging was or that I could start my own non-profit organization.

Catalyst was awesome. They provided a clubhouse, Oasis, that offered several groups and services such as Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP), help finding employment, and cooking classes among several other services. I really grew there mentally. I got back into college and was well balanced, and doing the things I enjoyed again.

After a few months I moved back to Atlanta to be closer to my mother and sister. I went to the County mental health department, participated in groups, and started blogging in September 2008.

Starting a blog was my sister's idea. She said it would allow me to keep track of my moods and improvements, blogging would be like my online diary. I blogged everyday about things I learned about my illness from books I had read and about the groups I attended at County mental health.

Now I am facilitating groups at the center where I receive treatment with the support of my therapist. I also facilitate groups at another facility. Through this experience I have learned what my strengths are and that with hope and support I can live the life I want to live despite having a mental health diagnosis. I also believe that if I can live the life I want to live, you can too!

Thank you for reading about my experience with living with schizophrenia. I hope this post inspires you to move forward after you or a loved one has been diagnosed with a mental illness.

I believe my wellness and ability to function at the level where I am now to organize, perform research, and to teach others is a blessing from God. I especially thank my family and treatment team for supporting me. I welcome questions, comments, and other opinions related to this blog.

To learn more about schizophrenia visit NAMI or Schizophrenia Society of Novia Scotia (Canada).