Skip to main content

Push Pause

“Within you, there is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at anytime and be yourself.” Hermann Hesse


In the past, I’ve struggled with maintaining employment because I became overwhelmed and stressed that led my symptoms to flare up. I’ve had to quit jobs that I enjoyed because I could not cope and manage well. Every day I reflect on strategies to maintain wellness; walking, resting, journaling, talking to my higher power, etc. 

In addition to medication management, I am mindful of my body’s need to decompress. To relax I listen to music or walk. However, with the summer heat I cannot maintain my walks, which helped clear my thoughts and boost my energy and mood. I recycle coping skills daily. Most of the time this practice works, but right now I can feel my mental capability to maintain daily responsibilities is wearing down. I recognize that to keep my job I must change my routine to create balance again.

While I love my job, my mental health requires more attention right now. I’ve had to make a difficult decision of reducing my work hours. In the meantime, I will continue to check in with my support system and stay committed to my therapy sessions. With more time I will able to keep my wellness and job. I am looking forward to developing my new self-care regimen. 

To acknowledge my limitations is to understand how to reposition myself to press forward. 

To understand my limitations is not to hold me back but to continue to develop my strengths.

These are some of the battles I continue to struggle with.

This is my life. 

Still, I am hopeful. I am determined, and believe I will overcome. Leaning on my experience with past setbacks, I aim to be careful with my mental health.


“Self-care means giving yourself permission to pause.” Cecilia Tran


Have you had to make a difficult decision between something that you love doing and your mental health? 

In those situations, how have you stayed hopeful and pressed forward? 

How do you balance your self-care and daily responsibilities?


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Lack of Trust: A Byproduct of My Mental Illness

In this entry, I'll share my experiences with Schizophrenia in regards to feeling lack of trust in others, paranoia, and isolation.... I remember my many episodes with Schizophrenia where I felt uneasy because of lack of trust in others. In the past, isolation was a giant bullying me around. Sometimes my mind would take me to a place of fear, hurt, and an unsettling spirit, which started with what seemed like a strange look, or a different feeling around an individual, when in reality it was another symptom of my undiagnosed illness- paranoia. My paranoia was rampant and dictated my life prior to experiencing a crisis, which led me to jail and into forced treatment and to receive an official diagnosis of Schizophrenia in 2007. In other words, my illness created enemies in my mind. For instance, I once believed my favorite kin was against me and I felt like she wanted me to fail, and I eventually thought she was conspiring to harm me. However, she never said anything to imply these ...
14 comments
Read more

Fear to Openness about Medication

I am concerned that I may be slipping into depression that may get worse if untreated. Prior to the birth of my child I never had a bout with depression, but as my body changed so did my hormones and my susceptibility to depression. A few months ago I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and at the time I knew I needed extra support from my my treatment team. I knew I needed to focus on my mental health because my anxiety level was up and down, it was difficult to concentrate, and I felt extremely overwhelmed and afraid my mental illness would rear its ugly head and try to destroy my recovery accomplishments. I spoke my therapist who contacted my doctor and let them know I was coming in the next morning as a walk-in, which I did and we tweaked my medication. Now, its hard to focus and to carry out minor assignments, sometimes I feel anxious for no reason, I am extremely tired and sleep more than usual, and I feel like I am on a downward spiral. Yet, I have reason to be. I have ...
12 comments
Read more

From the Terrors of Psychosis to Hope and a Better Life

For me, experiencing psychosis is an experience I will never forget. In short, psychosis is when an individual cannot distinguish reality. I endured a psychotic experience at the age of 20, almost five years ago, and still remember the terrors of the illness- officially diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenia in 2007. The manifestation of the illness dominated my livelihood whenever I was extremely suspicious, confused, forgetful, irritable, distant, irrational, and hearing criticizing voices when nobody was around. In my mind, everyone was envious of me because I had godly talents. I thought I could read people's minds and understand them, and sometimes they could read my mind as well. I rationalized these strange beliefs by my faith in God and the miracles of the Bible. I believed I was on a mission for God and eventually thought I was Jesus Christ being persecuted again when I was arrested for a crime I committed while not in the right state of mind. The bizarre thoughts increased....
9 comments
Read more