Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from January, 2024

Just for Today

For many years I've struggled with symptoms of depression and fight hard to control it. Low mood can manifest in several ways. For me, depression is war on energy, motivation, hygiene, concentration, productivity, anxiety, memory, and the pain of it all. Not being able to function at the level I'm capable of. The inability to finish tasks which used to be second-hand nature, easy and simple. After years of ongoing medication changes I've developed the right approach to conquer my depression with my doctor. Now I take two antidepressant medications, a mood stabilizer, and antipsychotic. Yet, that's only a fraction of the story to overcoming my challenges with symptoms.      I fight the mind wars everyday. In fact, earlier today I fought with myself to get out of bed to take my medicine in order to control the day's battles. My mountain was the burden and challenges to gathering enough energy to get up and move. I laid in bed playing out the role in my head. I envisio

Daily Challenges

This morning I slept in, but that was nothing new. These days my depression wins the battles, however, I believe I can still win the war. My dogs got me up and out of bed to go outside. It was about 40 degrees- good thing they were fast at using it. I ran an errand for household supplies. Then decided to cook myself something filling- grits. The bare minimum- no eggs, sausage, nor toast, just grits. Yet, I was proud of myself for that because it required energy which I was able to build on. Now I have my crockpot on and will cook some soup.      I've been struggling for a long time. My doctor and I have been tweaking my medication for years. Now I'm on two anti-depressants, a mood stabilizer, and an anti-psychotic. Still, I'm hopeful we will find a better medication cocktail. It seems the medication changes and dosage adjustments initially boosts my energy every time, this helps bring self-motivation and better days. However, shortly afterwards that great mood and morale d