Overcoming Schizophrenia

In this blog article I reflect on my last hospitalization that took place a couple of years ago. I share my process of recuperation. Provide insight on strategies to maintain support and guidance with caregiver and the treatment team. Give tips for you and your loved ones on how to manage the recovery process after hospitalization. Schizophrenia's Mind Wars Early warning signs my mental health is spiraling out of control begins with poor sleeping patterns. Specifically, not sleeping enough. Excessive energy to pull all-nighters. Followed by delusions and a range of false beliefs.     Mine starts with obsessive thoughts and hyper-religious ideas. Frequently, I'm a victim of situations. Recurring ideas of being spied on and followed. My train of thought runs rampant and uproots hallucinations. Going into the Hospital My last hospitalization was in 2022. Initially, I was ordered by my doctor into an in-patient facility. However, released within 72 hours despite my symptoms ...

 Was there ever a time that you refused to take the meds and how did you finally decide to?  Thank you asking me this question, because it's common and a great discussion. Initially, I refused medication simply because I didn't understand why? One day they started giving me pills. Without a warning, lesson, explanation, handout, or anything! Kinda like, here take this with this tiny paper cup of water and open your mouth to prove it.       It was routine in jail, but I wasn't required to take meds like everyone else before. Therefore, I refused. This worked until one day they threatened to get others involved to force medicate me and administer an injection. I challenged them. Do it! - Was my attitude.       Guards dressed like the S.W.A.T. team rushed in and restrained me. They were quite dramatic because at that point I didn't put up a fight and just laid there while they restrained me. Eventually, when I came out of being stuck and fo...

 How difficult was it to find the right doctor and would you say the mental health system is better in Georgia?  Thank you for this question. In short, I've experienced two states for treatment- California and Georgia. Both offer quality care based on the diverse programs they offer (clubhouses, peer support led centers, respite centers, and more). However, finding that doctor- there will be good ones and not so good ones everywhere.      I've been with my doctor for over 14 years and my therapist over 7 years. Partnering with your provider is essential. I encourage you to participate in your sessions by asking questions. "You get out of it whatever you put in it." I provide my therapist with an agenda every session to cover my pressing concerns and stresses.      Because these sessions are short it is imperative you come prepared to make them work for you. This is extremely important if you have limited options based on distance and transportatio...

Surviving life is hard enough in itself, and living with a diagnosis is tough. However, recovery is about working on self and building coping tools to manage the brain condition. The effort into getting well after hospitalization is resiliency at its best.      I define recuperating as the process of creating comfort, building stability, and focusing on developing wellbeing. Recovering after a hospitalization is a journey. I believe each of us should recognize our diligence at recuperating and be proud of ourselves.      After every hospitalization I've developed more insight. I was hospitalized earlier this year and my recuperation stage focused on routine to get me into a good place. Here I'll share 7 methods to recuperating after a hospitalization. 1. Medication. I've learned that it's important to discuss any questions about administering medication with a doctor or pharmacist to minimize complications. In the past, I assumed taking medication at any...

     When I was trapped in my mind's chaos I did not recognize the signals to seek heightened professional treatment. The signals were people's strange facial expressions as they stared at me, my family's determination to see me voluntarily hospitalized, my poor appetite and sleeping routine, and my aimless desires, which consistently shifted and even confused me. I said things that sounded bizarre, but I could not challenge them because my focus sporadically changed to the next thing before I gave it consideration.      I have a good memory and could recall difficult moments. Those times when I was ignored, dismissed, and overlooked. I remember those close to me who I thought would be some of my greatest advocates, but disappointed me. I choose to focus on the solution and not my sad incidents with people. More importantly, I know the individuals who took the time to investigate my situation, and tried to help.      I choose to focus on the ...

Since 2007, I learned how to regroup, develop coping strategies, and to hold on to hope. Still, I am studying myself and ways to manage. Living with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder takes work, and it is also rewarding.   In the past, I loss myself to catatonia, delusions, psychosis, paranoia, anxiety, fear, and hallucinations. I am grateful for access to treatment, support, and mentors in recovery. I've  seen the end of the world's spiritual war in my head. I've anxiously ran away from the people following me. I lost my sense of reality, rationality, and ability to problem-solve. My faith kept me grounded but also led me astray on the road to mental confusion. Prior to my diagnosis I rationalized my hallucinations and delusions through my faith. I heard the voices in my head talking about you and me. I saw the shadows and spirits from the corner of my eye. I read their minds as they read mine. I experienced the many symptoms of schizophrenia, and rediscovered myself, dev...

When I was diagnosed with schizophrenia 12 years ago my doctor gave me two pieces of information: (1) take your medication, and (2) manage your stress. Since then I manage my household, part-time job, and family obligations to my child. Still, I underestimated the importance of stress management. I was hospitalized last year due to what seemed like a decade of stressors. These stresses included financial hardship, the anniversary of my mother's passing, and birthday, the breakdown of important relationships to my support system, and lack of awareness of my triggers, and warning signs. In short, triggers and warning signs are similar but different like a stop sign versus a yield sign on the road. Triggers are events or experiences that create negative consequences either emotionally, physically, socially, and legally. For example, a trigger may be going to a place that reminds one of a poor experience, and thus creates tension, stress, and dread, which leads to irritability ...

What’s On My Mind? Coping Takes Work! The Workshop (Description) What’s On My Mind? Coping Takes Work! The Workshop An introduction to a peer’s second book, based on her lived experience with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Despite maintaining wellness, her condition is still an illness that requires work! Eleven years after her first breakdown that resulted in her diagnosis, she has yet another experience where her reality is in diverse worlds in her mind, only. Coping Takes Work! focuses on how she endures the second-time around, still struggling, but not giving in! Through these experiences, reflecting on her first break, and her recent, she still sees hope. What To Expect from The Workshop A group discussion on the following concerns and needs to prepare an individual for a crisis and/or hospitalization: Warning Signs Triggers Practical Scenarios  Your Coping Skills  Advance Directive The Facilitator Ashley Smith is a lived experienced expert, c...

September is "National Recovery Month." It seems that I almost forgot this?! However, I do not want you to let this special month of recognition go by without additional reflection on the meaning of recovery. Despite living with mental health challenges since my diagnosis in 2007, my definition of recovery changes to me! Although I was diagnosed with schizophrenia, my treatment team switched my official diagnosis to schizo-affective disorder early on without much discussion. As you may be aware, already, schizo-affective disorder is schizophrenia, and bipolar disorder. Over the years I gained a lot of knowledge about schizophrenia, and not enough about bipolar disorder, which I will work on, every diagnosis requires attention at recovery! Every diagnosis can damage a good person and their loved ones, however, recovery can overcome many struggles with mental health concerns... In 2007, I was hospitalized. And, in 2018, I was hospitalized, again. Through my experience ...

Although I am doing well now I know deep inside that I can have a relapse despite being on medication, and become hospitalized again. I keep that in mind to humble myself and to reflect on my experiences in order to learn and grow from them. I've been admitted to a California state hospital before, for three months, back in 2007. I do not have a lot of history of being in the hospital, but that experience alone helped me come to terms with my illness and motivate myself to stay in treatment in order to avoid hospitalization. However, don't misconstrue my experience and goals of trying to stay out of the hospital. I do not agree that the hospital is a bad place or is the enemy, and that we should avoid it at all costs. Yet, I understand there are incidences where hospital staff abuse patients, which is frightening and upsetting, at the same time. I can understand that some of my peers need to be hospitalized for diverse reasons an...

There will be ups and downs living with mental illness. Recently, I've experienced some bad days, which concerned me very much because I do not have a lot of bad days to the extent that I need to take a step back and to regroup- emotionally, mentally, and physically. Stress makes my illness flare up or worsen, I know this by experience, however, fortunately I usually understand how to cope with the stresses of my life- discussing concerns with family and friends, writing, listening to music, or walking- I handle my stress like other people handle theirs who are living with or without a mental health diagnosis. In the past, my stresses of college and finances led my symptoms to escalate to psychosis- where I heard voices that other people did not hear, saw individuals that did not exist, experienced confusion, anxiety, irritability, irrational thinking, racing thoughts, etc. etc. A few weeks ago I experienced some bad days . In the beginning I felt jittery, anxious, and t...

Are we listening? Are we listening to the one in control of recovery? Who is in control of recovery? Is it our doctors? Our family members and friends? For a brief time, I did not have choices in my recovery. My life was limited by the state system in jail. In fact, I had my choice to deny medication taken from me. I was court-ordered to medication compliance, which was encouraged by my family. I am thankful my family advocated for medication compliance because it ultimately saved my life. During the time I was not well, I recognized this only after I was medicated and educated on my health. When I was not well four years ago, I believed I was a victim of conspiracy. I thought someone in my family were playing a prank and took me to an enclosed facility with routines not of my own (jail). I believed others were against me and working together to poison me and to spy on me; I felt my life was in danger, and that I had reason to feel uneasy and suspicious. As a result, I did not sp...

While I was at a California State Hospital I stayed in a coed unit of about 50 people. There were about three to four people to a room. The women were roomed on one side of hall while the men on the other. The hospital divided groups of people based on long-term stay and shorter term stays- I was among the short-term units. I remember the intake process, which was lengthy. I endured several comprehension, medical, and personal tests. The staff wanted to know everything- my childhood experiences, schooling, knowledge of my mental illness, the reason I was there - EVERYTHING! In the hospital, we were provided three meals a day with flexible diets if stated - vegetarian, no pork, low sodium, etc. We earned points by good behavior- going to classes, cleaning our room, dressing in an appropriate manner, and doing whatever we were supposed to. The points went toward a store where we could purchase candy, accessories, and other items. Whenever someone got into trouble they would lose their fr...

In my experience, I stayed in the hospital for 2-3 months to get an official mental health diagnosis, and also to regain competency for trial. I was in jail and in a state hospital for taking a military truck from the airport. Taking the truck was related to my nervous breakdown or psychotic break. My hospital stay was productive. I reunited with my mother and family, and participated in group therapy. I was sent to a California State Hospital because my (unknown) mental illness had gotten so severe that I became catatonic- not moving my body limbs for periods at a time. I was extremely paranoid that staff would try to poison me and thus, I stopped eating and drinking. As a result, I was sent to the emergency room several times. Also, I failed a competency test for trial, in short, I was so sick that the court hearings could not proceed and the judge mandated medication compliance and a visit to the state hospital. My illness had taken over the loving, ambitious, go-getter, Ashley. I...

This is for the family members of people with schizophrenia. Sometimes people are faced with hard decisions such as allowing their loved one to go into the hospital. Remember the benefits when such choices as these are made. A mother of a boy with schizophrenia is challenged by the choice to let her son live in a medical facility, temporarily. I know of her situation through an online support group. I said she should allow it because the boy will get the best mental health support that's needed for that moment. A lot of attention is required for a person's wellness. And professionals have learned techniques to help individuals with mental illness overcome it. Trust professionals and know that your loved one is getting the help they need in order to get well again and to return to you. Sometimes a person may require undivided attention until they figure everything out. Think about it, it may be difficult for you to provide this need, especially if you do not know much about it. ...