Burning at a Low Flame

Have you ever tried to avoid an auto accident, but no matter how hard you tried you couldn’t stop the crash? Suffering with this season’s depression is like dodging a car only to accidentally hit another on the road. For over six months I’ve tried to manage depression by using my coping tools. Initially, my depression stemmed from a toxic workplace. Yet, due to the nature of my condition this stress aggressively activated low mood that progressed and continues to penetrate my mood even after removing myself from that environment.

Stress worsens any medical condition which is no different for people living with mental illness. Medication helps lessen the symptoms, however, living with a brain disorder of any kind is challenging and requires more than pills. Even stress can penetrate the most effective treatment that generally controls the most severe symptoms.

Initially I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, but over the years it’s evolved into schizoaffective disorder, bipolar type. That is schizophrenia and bipolar disorder combined. Symptoms of my diagnosis extend over a wide range of challenges. My symptoms led to isolation from those that I appreciate, value, and trust the most. Other symptoms included: delusions, anxiety, irritability, hallucinations, psychosis, mania, and depression, etc. Now I am working harder at crushing the spirit of depression.

Most days I aim to fulfill a series of self-care activities to boost my mood. I take medication, eat breakfast, and have a plan for the day. Moreover, I work hard at uplifting myself. I always need more energy, but the depression drains me regularly. Therefore, I journal, listen to motivational talks and sermons, read a chapter to gain knowledge, maintain good hygiene, and make time to praise my higher power. I acknowledge my spiritual army, recognize blessings, and ask for specific needs. My self-care routine demands a lot of time for me to have a good day. And, as my day progresses, I keep a record of daily tasks, no matter how insignificant they seem, which I call my “realistic journal,” opposed to my things to do list. I review my realistic journal to avoid beating myself up about not getting things done. Also, I reflect on it and then list what I am grateful for.

Despite my self-care rituals, work routine, family life, and treatment, which includes medication and therapy, I am still chained to depression. For the last couple of months I’ve had my doctor adjust my medication. I engage in therapy regularly. I’ve experienced relief for a moment, but my oversleeping, constant worrying, and low energy always returns. And, I am continuing on my depression drive no matter how hard I resist.

I overcame much and expect to overcome even more. Regularly, I fantasize about having great days with minimal effort. Waking up, jumping out of bed, getting ready for the day without the weight of depression, and requirement to activate my self-care program. I will continue to work at my recovery, medication management, and strengthen my coping skills. I am not able to perform like the fire I once was, but I am still burning at a low flame. Still, I have hope that I’ll feel better, and come out of this season of depression like before.

No, Please, That's Not Me

Prior to my diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia I did some things that I am not proud of. Now that I look back on things I blame my illness for my poor judgment. I am by no means condoning the behavior I carried out, and will share with you here. I will provide a few instances where my behavior was unlike me and caused an uproar. This post shows how schizophrenia affects other people. This post is for the family members and friends of people with schizophrenia, or showing bizarre behaviors. First, I asked my mother permission to give my friend a statue that was in my mother's house. My mother agreed to give my friend the statue, however, I took her permission a step further to get rid of what she had at my discretion. At the time I did not live with my mother who was away on a business trip. My mother buys and sells things so she had a lot of collectibles, antiques, and other interesting stuff. While my friend and me were in my mother's house my friend saw a lot of stuff that s

What Is Remission?

Remission is the absence of symptoms for at least six months with the support of medication. In other words, a doctor who has never seen you before may not diagnose you as a person with schizophrenia anymore. Remission is also high functioning in several aspects of life, living independently, goinig to school or to work, and socializing with other people. However, this does not mean the patient is cured or the illness has went away, the illness is still present, however, under control. Remission is achieved with the assistance of medication. "Published studies suggest that 10% to 20% of people with schizophrenia have remission of their illness as they get older, 20% get worse, but in a large majority (60% to 70%), the course of illness remains relatively unchanged." To reach remission it is recommended that you aim for a stress-free environment. Therefore, do things to relieve stress such as journaling, exercising, talking to friends, listening to or creating music, making a

by A Guest Blogger: For Addicts, Recovery Means Creating a New Life

If you’re struggling to maintain your sobriety, you aren’t alone. There are millions of fighters just like you working toward reclaiming their lives from drugs and alcohol. There are a few common traits that many successful recovering addicts share. Keep reading to find out what they are and how you can follow in their footsteps. They establish new patterns You can’t continue to live your life the same was you did when you were using. You must change and adapt to your newfound sobriety. Consider a career change; many recovering addicts find they have more success by starting their own business. One career that is easy to enter is dog walking. As a dog walker , you’ll reap many rewards including getting to spend time with dogs, which can actually boost your recovery efforts and stave off depression. Dogs have been used as part of a treatment plan for users as young as 11 and come with the added benefit of helping you stay physically active. Plus, being with

Overcoming Schizophrenia

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