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Upside Down

I made an error. My mind jumps on the merry-go-round. I think of everything, but potential solutions to fix it. I froze and a wave of negative thoughts about my mistake penetrated my entire body and energy. Shoulders stay high, my chest is tight, I maintain an unsteady breathing rate which broadcasts my internal chaos from the tone of my voice, alone. I sound like the blaring uneasiness of severe stress, worry, anxiety, discomfort, and dread. 


I regain a moment of control and focus on fixing the issue. However, my stress level continues to rise as I meditate on the problem, and the perception I might have portrayed. Frantically, I make a call, send messages, and continue the vicious cycle in my mind. 


Anxiety. I feel upside down whenever I go deeper in the dark forest of stress and worry. How can I manage to end the storm within? I put on the sounds of waves, but no relief comes of this because I cannot concentrate. I can’t meditate when my mind jumps like this. I research ways to cope with anxiety on YouTube, but don’t have the time to review it to get a grip on immediate stress reduction techniques. 


Therefore, I brainstorm a list of ways to reduce the tension. Performing house chores or talking to a friend would help right now. I sent a text to my friend for a check-in. They respond. Yay, relief is on the way! But, not fast enough, they’re taking forever to call. 


In the meantime, I reflect a tip somebody gave me. I raise my arm over the top my head to place my hand on my back. Gently, I rub my back in circular motion, like calming a baby or child. Yes, for a split second I felt bliss—calmness.


And, my friend called. As we discuss my error my anxiety rises again. I know I must relax. I take my anxiety medication. She points out that my anxiety seems to be a regular concern lately. I agree. I redirect the conversation to take back control of my thoughts and to focus on something else. Still, my chest is tight, breathing irregular, and the heavy weight of anxiety and stress intensifies and runs rampant through my entire body.


Finally, she recommends deep breathing. I took a couple of deep breaths. It was okay, but not enough. Then she insists I use the Calm app. I’ve heard of it from a few people, and with the results she claims, I’m looking forward to putting it to good use. 


Ultimately, I share my experience by writing and created this blog article. It helped to slow the speed of the anxiety train in my mind. I can manage this better next time. I can control my anxiety…


Help me identify more coping strategies to get instant relief from anxiety.


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Comments

Ashley Smith said…
Thank you for the tips. I'll definitely consider staying focused on the moment and not the past. Ashley
May 27, 2022 at 7:59 AM
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