The Author

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Atlanta, Georgia, United States
I am overcoming schizophrenia, and I believe others can too. Here is how I am managing my condition...

Monday, February 9, 2009

Schizophrenia: Disorganized Thinking

A part of cognitive symptoms include disorganized thinking or specifically for me loose associations and poor concentration. I would make two different things connect that had nothing to do with each other. I was also delusional or believed things that was not true with no valid evidence to prove anything. Also, it was hard for me to focus and to complete homework and work assignments. (Side note: while I was experiencing these symptoms I did not know I had developed adult onset schizophrenia).

For example, a taxi cab driver told me to 'stay out of trouble,' this statement led me to believe that he was following me or watching me. This was also another type of delusion. Another example, is while I was working for for a relative we received a piece of mail from New Jersey. (Side note: New Jersey is also where my ex-boyfriend visited a lot). I assumed my mother went to New Jersey and drove my ex-boyfriend away from me. I accused my mother of taking away my ex-boyfriend and my father. My parents had been divorced since I was a baby.

At work and school it would take me hours to complete simple assignments that I could have easily fulfilled prior to the onset of schizophrenia. I tried to work around doing homework by taking naps, working on other projects, or creating study groups. At work I got embarrassed that it took me a whole day to complete the task of writing a couple of small paragraphs.

Disorganized thinking is also a subtype of schizophrenia. It is also categorized by racing thoughts, poor speech, making up words, delusions, and a hard time completing basic tasks such as showering. I also struggled with the bathing part, because I thought the soap would burn my skin.

Resources:

50 Signs of Mental Illness by James Whitney Hicks, M.D.

Disorganized Schizophrenia-
http://www.ohiohealth.com/bodymayo.cfm?id=6&action=detail&ref=3212

11 comments:

earlyriser said...

In my early years with SZA, I believed I was a psychic and a prophet. Another time I thought I discovered a murdered body.
I'm fortunate that in all those years that I only had those two "breaks."

Valash said...

Me too, earlyriser. I thought I had the gift of discernment and could read minds. At one point I even thought I was Jesus Christ, and being persecuted again.

Ashley

Just A Chic... said...

My brother swears that my daughter and I came went to see him in Florida. He is very adament about it and even recalls specific details. She and I were never there.

He also claims that there are two CIA agaents who have been tracking him all over the U.S. (He's a drifter) He says they're trying to frame him for some murder that took place when he was 14. (The murder supposedly happened in Virginia, he was in Alaska)

And he paces ALOT. When he's pacing he makes these like machine gun sounds. I have no idea why. It's like there a war going on inside of his mind.

I wish he would get help.

beautiful mind, complex life said...

I thought that I was Jesus too. It's funny how many of us think we're Jesus. There can't be that many Jesus's! ;)
I also have had all the other types of delusional thought processes you describe, and some of them, I still have on ocassion, even years after starting medications.

beautiful mind, complex life said...

Just as Chic:
I also thought the CIA was after me for years. This is a very, very common, basically classic hallmark symptom of Schizophrenia. I guess it makes sense that if you're paranoid, you might develop a lot of delusions about the world of spies and espionage and mind control and all that. I think figuring the CIA is after us probably happens to most people with this illness who live in the United States.

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Desperate said...

I'm so happy to have found your blog. I have never been diagnosed with this disease but I belief I suffer from it. For a while I thought that people were reading my mind, or that I killed people's souls with my mind etc. At the moment I'm having serious problems at work. I find it hard to follow simple instructions, or when the situation requires quick thinking I seem to move about in a daze. What can I do to combat that form of the disease? My boss or co-workers always seem baffled by me and it's to a point where I fear being asked a question. I need to know how to repair myself so I can function at work.

Anonymous said...

Yeah I thought i had the gift of seeing 'shadow people' but they were out to kill me. I was also convinced that aliens were putting thoughts and dreams into my head.

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah and about the CIA. I spent a month training to be a spy.

Chris said...

For a few days I once thought I was Jesus and in the same episode I thought maybe I was an angel of death who was to bring death to to earth by starting plagues. I did these made up rituals and was getting msgs from cats and connecting all kinds of things togethers. It was after a very stressful time. Now I see that is was crazy. But then it was very real. I'm also a combat vet. I was a machine gunner in Iraq. I have had heavy doeses of mushrooms and LSD. I've listened to hours of Terrence McKenna. Which is it? Skitso? PTSD? Bipolar? To much McKenna? Drug flash backs? All of the above?

Ashley Smith said...

Hi Chris,

I encourage you to seek a professional health care provider to get diagnosed. Many mental illnesses are similar, however, a doctor can distinguish which mental health concern a person has.

I am not a doctor to diagnosis anyone. I do appreciate your openness and hope you receive medical care to answer your questions.

Best regards,
Ashley Smith